The Prodigal Startup

by Victor Stone
Posted April 16, 2001

The soft strings came oozing out of the small desktop speakers with the bleating whales fighting for the mid-range in a cacophony of non-melodious drones. The sound of a small gurgling electric fountain hanging on the wall mixed in to give the overall illusion of a train station's bathroom complete with muffled muzak soundtrack and an overflowing urinal.

Receipts for air fare, cruise and four star hotel were stapled to the top sheet of an expense report which lay at the corner of the large desk with a 'Sign here' semi-transparent sticky positioned strategically near the bottom of the cover sheet. At the top of the report in the 'Title' field was neatly printed 'Stress Management Executive Retreat Weekend." A small bowl of freshly washed shaved carrots was resting next to the unsigned report.

Vice President Hank Weiner sat facing the industrial greenery outside his corner office with his head back and eyes closed, leaning slightly back in his rocking, seven cushion, five-roller-blade wheeled, specially imported hand-crafted chair. He was practicing his breathing ("in through the nose, hold, out through the mouth, in through the nose, hold...") when the air was pierced by the screech of his young high-energy admin "Hank, I finished writing the division memo and put it in your inbox. I used the standard belt-tightening template. It's ready to mail out to the division.."

Jarred out of his attempted meditative state Hank's chair glided backwards and struck the desk sending his torso forward in a lurch and bringing the taste of that morning's soy protein shake back into his mouth. After regaining his balance, he swiveled around, took a deep swallow and managed his frustration.

"Did you mention the downturn in the economy and our sector? Being dogged about wasteful expenses, focusing on strategic imperatives..."

"Yes, sir."

"...tightening headcount, making every hire count, great opportunities ahead, not to panic, no chance of layoffs, rewards for hard work..."

"Yes, sir. All that's in the template. And Chris is here, whenever you're ready."

He nodded and motioned for Maggie to send Chris in.

"'Morning," Chris said as he came in and sat in the four-legged armless metal guest chair opposite the VP's desk.

"Good morning, Chris. It's been a long time. Have you had a good time in your worldly travels?" Hank said with a broad sincere-like smile.

"Yes," Chris acknowledged, folding his arms over his chest and crossing his legs tightly.

"Well, I'm sorry your start-up dreams didn't work out but I have to say, selfishly, that we're glad to have you back. It was a sad day for our engineering staff when left us... left us... when was it?"

"Nine months ago."

"Yes, nine months ago. Anyway, it's great to have you back where you belong. I'm assuming HR has explained about our compensation package for returning prodigal sons..."

"Actually, Hank, 'prodigal' means extravagant and reckless and while it's true I took a chance leaving here to join a dot-com start-up it was very well thought out and a calculated risk."

"Of course, of course, Chris!"

"I mean, I put all personal issues aside. But I must admit I questioned some of the personnel decisions in my group right before I left. But then again I'm told that group doesn't even exist anymore, anyway." Chris was trying hard not to mention names, counting on the VP to remember the specific circumstances of his last group.

"I concentrated on what's best for me," Chris continued. "I mean, in my position, you have to understand, I did what I think was the right thing for me. Taking everything into account, that is. I mean, I couldn't not take advantage of an opportunity, considering what could have been the upside of the situation at the company I went to. Especially considering the position they offered me and, you know, my dissatisfaction with the way things were being run here, not that that had any influence over my decision to leave, I had to at least try to see what was out there. Besides, like I said, I know things have changed since I left."

If pressed, Hank would have to admit he was finding it difficult to follow Chris' somewhat impassioned soliloquy but continued to nod with acceptance and understanding in the hopes that the clouds would clear soon.

As he continued, Chris' back was pressed harder and harder against the stiff guest chair. He would periodically cross and uncross his legs trying hard not to be distracted by the swirling gurgles of the wall-mounted fountain.

"You see, I'm confident," Chris continued, now using his hands for emphasis, "that I made important engineering contributions while I was here..."

"No doubt!" the VP cheerleaded. "Would you be more comfortable on the couch?" he asked motioning toward the low plush sofa against the window.

Chris waived off the offer and continued unfettered. "...and considering the valuable, if short, experience I gained at the start-up, well, that's why I was, um, surprised at the lack of, um, flexibility, in the returning compensation package..."

Still somewhat distracted by confusion, Hank pushed the bowl of baby-carrots toward Chris who grimaced and shook his head in a quick and definitive 'no' . While reaching for the bowl Hank paused to noticed the unsigned expense report.

"Well, I can't argue with your feelings," Hank said. "They are, after all, your feelings. It is the way you see things. It would be silly for me to try to argue with that. I couldn't, after all, say 'Hey, you're not feeling that way!' he said with a jovial pride at his stress-free management skills.

"I mean, the options package was generous for sure, and I'm grateful for that, but I was trying to impress on HR that I'd give up some of the options for a larger cash signing bonus, because well, if we really are in a recession then cash is...well, an important commodity, especially if layoffs are coming..."

Hank's eyes widened so large and fast that his eyebrows seemed to fly off the top of his head. His back stiffened involuntarily. "There are not layoffs coming!!" He suddenly found himself irritated by the bellowing blowholes and forcefully swiveled around and slapped the CD player several times until the sounds stopped. "That's ridiculous!" Hank bristled, now facing Chris again. "We wouldn't be hiring you back if we didn't have total faith in the company. We've given you a very generous package and while sure, the company's stock price is in a dip but that's just a reflection ofthe market as a whole, but if the so-called 'pundits' say the word 'recession' enough then, yes, consumers and corporate buyer's confidence will be shaken and that will trigger downturns! But we've compensated for some of that with a salary above what you had before you left. It's just preposterous to think we would go to all that trouble just to turnaround and... and... well, I don't even want to think about it." Hank's face was flush as he considered just how much cleanup there would be if he threw the bowl of carrots at the infernal fountain.

Chris was taken aback at the ferocity of the reaction and was resigned to a guilty yet reluctant appreciation for the raise, however modest, the VP was referring to.

In a much more subdued tone, assuming the topic was closed, the VP changed to his own agenda. "Now Chris, do you remember Simon? I believe the two of you worked on your last project here together when he started at the company last Christmas."

Chris didn't know how to react to the mention of Simon's name considering this was the 'personnel decision' he had been referring to earlier. He decided to play it safe. "Yes, I remember Simon well."

"Good! Well, it seems he's been having a few problems adjusting to the company. Nothing serious, but sometimes it's hard for newcomers to get their bearings here. For a while it seemed like Tripper and him would hit it off but for some reason that may have made the situation worse. I'm hoping that a veteran like yourself could help him get back on track and ship his product."

Disappointed but afraid of being seen as ungrateful (again) Chris quickly calculated that perhaps with the backing of a VP and intrigued with the idea that Simon, the once-golden-nemesis-boy, had fallen from grace he could succeed where before he was humiliated. "That could work. What is Simon working on?"

"Well, we're not quite sure."

"What do you mean?" Chris asked.

"No one has seen him for a while. We think he may be out of the country."

"But what do you want me to do? Find him?"

"Exactly. Find him and find out what he's working on, then help him ship it."

"Whatever 'it' is," Chris said softly but audible.

The VP frowned at the remark and Chris quickly changed his expression to one more appropriately appreciative. "I think it's a great way for you to make immediate impact on returning and it will give you a good feel for what's been going on since you left."

"Any suggestion where I should start?"

"I hear that quite a lot of people are concerned for him and are looking for him. I, myself have a personal, vested interest in getting a hold of Simon, as well, so start asking around to see if anyone has heard anything and when you find him make sure to let me know," Hank concluded with a vice-presidential finality. "Was there anything else on your mind Hank? Anything else I can do for you to help you settle back in?"

"No, no," Chris said. "I'm all set. Looking forward to jumping back into the fire."

"Good! Well, let me know." Hank said smiling as he turned to his computer and started punching the keys.

Later that day, in his new, bare office Chris skimmed over the division-wide mail from the vice-president praising everyone's resolve in these hard times and encouraging everyone to stay focused on the mission at hand.