I
must be getting old. When somebody mentions Hooters all I can
think of is chicken wings. I could care less about the scantily
clad waitresses, the only time I will have my eye out for one
is to ask when my wings when will be ready. Actually, even when
I was younger I knew better than to ogle girls at their place
of employment. Out of the thousands of guys that they see in and
out of that place in a month do you really think they care about
you? Sure they have to be polite to you, they are waitresses,
but if you only knew what they really though of you, you would
never go back.
It's with some surprise, and a suspiciously raised
eyebrow, that I announce Hooters: Road Trip for the PSX. Just
the fact that it's being released on the PSX makes me wonder if
this game is avoiding production costs. The fact that the game
will retail around the $10 mark doesn't exactly inspire confidence
either. Is this a glorified commercial for Hooters? Slapping your
name on a bad videogame will do more harm than good to any corporation's
image but what do I know? I'm not the marketing genius for Hooters
- but methinks there may be an opening available not long after
this game is released.
Hooters:
Road Trip is basically a racing game that puts you in various
locations across the States culminating at stops along the way
at the various Hooter establishments where you can grab a plate
of wings and a beer - and that better be all that you grab. There
are 16 cars that you can choose from with six more that you can
unlock. Difficulty adjustments can be made to the game to accommodate
players of all skill levels, particularly morons that have never
played a videogame before but hang out at Hooters trying to get
lucky and have read about this game on the paper place setting
beneath their plate. Like that typical, local-celebrity-type,
dumb jock that will no doubt be featured playing this game in
person at your local Hooters to promote its release.
The game features music, from what the promo calls,
"well-known artists." Just keep in mind that "well-known,"
does not necessarily translate to "good." As if that
wasn't enough, you will be treated to video clips of bikini-clad
Hooter girls congratulating you on being number one if you have
what it takes. Remember they will only do this for you. No one
else in world will ever see this because you're not only the best
videogame player in the world, but you're also the best looking.
This game would insult my intelligence....if I
had any...had any left after playing this game that is. It's pandering
the lowest common denominator and unfortunately, that means me
and you. Don't give 'em the satisfaction.
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