Jedi Kasumi30 Jedi Kasumi (A Star Wars/Ranma Crossover) by Jim Robert Bader (Featuring characters and situations created by George Lucas and Rumiko Takahashi. This is purely a work of fiction and is not intended to compromise the copyrights of any other creative persons. I have nothing worth suing me for, so please be gentle...) WARNING---SOME ROUGH LANGUAGE AND COARSE PROFANITY AHEAD, WITH LOTS OF SUGGESTIVE COMMENTARY THAT MAY BE DEEPED INAPPROPRIATE FOR YOUNGERS AND TALIBAN STUDENTS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! (Editor's note: It has recently come to my attention that George Lucas has expressly stated in the previews of the next Star Wars movie his views that a Jedi Knight can never allow strong feelings to rule their conscious being, not anger or hate or fear or even LOVE! As this is a plainly ridiculous philosophy, very much diametrically opposed to my own view, I am in the somewhat awkward position of disagreeing with the Star Wars creator on a very fundamental part of his own concept. In good conscience I cannot agree with Lucas that Love should be forbidden to the Jedi, and therefore I must respectfully thumb my nose at the jerk and tell him to take a hike for the purposes of this story. I'm using Eastern concepts here anyway, and though Jedi may accept abject poverty like a Buddhist monk, it is recognized that Love is a universal emotion and can NEVER be banished from the human psyche. If you ask me, revisionism such as this is what gave Phantom Menace a bad name, and do I need to say the word "Metachlorines" to make the point that a fanfic author is entitled to take dramatic license where he deems it necessary? Just thought I'd state this for the record...) Episode Thirty: The Wrong Way Home Having stunned the Tendos with his declaration of intent to engage Akane to Kodachi Kuno, Godai next plans to make a call to Soun Tendo in order to explain his real intentions, while Akane, Kodachi, Tatewaki, Kimiko and Trieste attempt to sort out Their own feelings on this matter... Meanwhile, back at the dojo, Ranma has been getting a vigorous education from his own two able-bodied fiancées, Nabiki and Kasumi, who have finally succumbed to exhaustion from their passionate exertions, quite unaware of these peculiar events happening at the Kuno mansion... Ukyo and Shampoo, on the other hand, are in training to defeat the dreaded Golden Pair in Martial Arts Figure Skating and are likewise Ignorant to the perilous situation in which their friend, Akane, has currently become entangled... Akane, having Pledged herself to Ukyo, now finds herself in an untenable situation of her own ironic making, engaged to a girl whom she sexually molested a couple of months ago after Kodachi attempted to ambush her in her own bedroom, ignorant of the Consequences of presenting herself to the girl-crazy Force Master like a blue-plate dinner special... Trieste and Kimiko, on the other hand, are caught unprepared for these events and must sort matters out on their own, unaware that the men in their lives are plotting mischief of a different Sort behind their backs as they are soon to discover... Soun Tendo paused to regard the telephone, which was just then ringing as he was in the process of passing through the hallway. Ordinarily Kimiko or Kasumi would answer the thing, but being alone and the man of the house he opted to take the initiative, hoping it would not be a telemarketer out to sell him something (and as his wife and daughters could testify, Soun had almost no sales resistance whatsoever). "Mushi-Mushi," he said politely, "Who is this?" To his complete surprise the voice on the other end of the line was not only familiar but irritatingly so, "Skinny, is that you? Long time no hear from, Bro." Soun half removed the phone from his ear as he glared at it and said, "Godai- kun? Is that you?" "The one and only," came the ingratiatingly cheerful response of the barrel- chested, scissors-wielding nemesis of Furinkan High from Soun's own misplaced childhood, "Thought you'd forgotten all about me after all this time, eh Man?" "No," Soun said levelly, "But I have been working on it." "Hey, don't be that way, Skinny," Godai Kuno responded, "Fact is I was calling you up to talk business. Say, did you know your wives stopped in to chat with me and the Mrs., and they brought little Akane with them?" "Wives?" Soun arched a bushy eyebrow at this, but then he blushed in comprehension, hastily responding, "I don't know what you mean. I have only one wife, Trieste-san is a welcome member of my family, but that is all she is..." "Oh yeah, sure she is," Godai pleasantly scoffed, "A cute honey like that who your wife all but fawns all over and you're telling me you're not getting any of that action? C'mon, pull the other leg! A man would have to be dumb and blind not to see what's going down here, Skinny ol' buddy." As a matter of fact, Soun knew perfectly well what Godai was implying, and knew how much of the accusation was true, but there was no way this side of Hades that he was ever going to admit to that on an open party line, "So...what did my wives---AH---I mean Kimiko and Trieste have to say to you?" "They didn't tell you what they were coming over for?" Godai tch-tched, "Man, that's wicked! Seems your little Akane got into some kind of a mess with my Kodachi, and your ladies thought it might provoke a scandal and wanted to apologize..." "What---AGAIN???" Soun faintly moaned in dreadful apprehension. "Oh, you mean it's happened before?" Godai asked in sympathetic tones. "Um...never mind that," Soun averred, "Just...what exactly---no, scratch that. The less I know of the details the better for my blood pressure. I'm so sorry, Godai-san, my Akane...she's going through this phase and..." "Can't keep her hand out of the nookie, huh?" Godai remarked more bluntly than Soun would have liked, "Well...welcome to the club. Seems my little Koko-chan has been spreading it around a little herself over at that all-girls school she's been attending. And here I thought Saint Hebereke would be a nice, stable environment to help her avoid trouble..." "You mean...you too?" Soun blinked, both amazed and horrified at the implications. "Yeah, think it's something spreading around, like a virus?" Godai asked, "Of course Koko-chan thinks I don't really know what she's been up to, but some of the girls she's been playing around with are the daughters of some friends of mine, and...well...it gets kind of expensive after a while having to hush up that many people." "I'm sorry to hear this," Soun said with complete sincerity, "We've had to plead on bended knees ourselves to stave off the wrath of some of the parents of the girls that my Akane...well...you understand how it is?" "Hey, I'm with you there completely," Godai duly noted, "Well, the deal is this...your ladies were eager to try and stave off a possible split with us, but Hitome and me...we've been kind of discussing what to do about little Kodachi for a while now. You see...back when Hitome was still a little...you know...before she took her medicine and got therapy and trained with Trieste-san to learn how to channel her emotions more constructively. Well...back when she was still a pretty abusive bitch mistreating our kids because I was such a selfish louse that I ignored them and looked the other way...Kodachi's never completely been able to forgive us, know what I mean? My fault really, I wish I'd been a better father when it really counted. Koko-chan's just got all these latent aggressive issues that she needs to work out, so I was wondering...you think you could help her?" "I don't really know," Soun replied, "But I'll do whatever I can if it will make things better for you and your daughter." "That's what I always liked about you, Skinny," Godai said with unmixed affection, "You were always a straight shooter. Even when you didn't know what the right thing was, you still wanted to do it. Well, this is how it stands. Your wife and Trieste-san don't know this, but I just played a little trick on them, and on our daughters too. You want in on this deal or not?" Soun blinked, "What? You mean deceive my own family? Over what?" "Oh, nothing too radical," Godai said, "Hitome and I just agreed to maybe, like, engage Kodachi to Akane for a lark. You know, sort-of play-like, just to see if we'd get a reaction." It took Soun a moment to get his eyebrows under control, but his mustache was noticeably curling along the edges, "You WHAT???" "Hey, calm down! Like I said, it was a joke, y'know? Like back in the old days when we used to be kids playing pranks on one another, like that time Picardin Piccolo and me tied you up and left you hanging in the girl's showers, or that other time we hooked you up on that blind date with Kuonji Yumi, and you got stuck with her in that elevator on the Tokyo towers right about the time it got hit by that freaky black lightning thing? Or that other time I shaved off your mustache then gave you that fake one and the cigar and told the girls that you were doing a Groucho Marx impression? Or that other time when you went to the costume ball looking like Toshiro Mofune?" "That was Toshiro Mofune," Soun patiently, "He was doing an autograph tour and people got the two of us confused with one another." "Oh yeah," Godai amended, "People really did get you two mixed up, even that Happosai guy, your gramps, when he showed up wound up hauling off the wrong player. You never did tell me how you wound up on that movie stage doing Toshiro's part, though..." "I've been trying to live it down ever since," Soun said patiently, his grip upon the phone turning white-knuckled as the memories flooded back of the numerous cruel pranks that had been played upon him by the likes of Godai Kuno. "Well, anyway," Godai resumed, "The deal is this, we engaged our daughters together---temporarily---as an excuse to get Koko-chan out of the house more often to where she might actually try spending more time around girls her own age under circumstances that don't involve shaving cream and a bull whip. Not that I mind Koko-chan turning out to be the spitting image of her mother, but a father has to worry sometimes that his only daughter will never really settle down and marry...to a boy, that is. You see what I'm saying?" "Unfortunately I do," Soun began to relax by a fraction so that he no longer seemed ready to crush the phone receiver into powder, "And you think pretending to engage them is the answer?" "Well, can you think of a better way of getting them to spend some time together where they don't wind up terrorizing the neighborhood?" Godai reasoned, "And if they hit it off, so what? Means we solve both our problems at the same time, eh? But if they decide to give up on girls and go back to boys..." For the first time during the entire conversation Soun began to smile, "I see...you mean pair two predatory birds together in the hopes that they will regulate the behavior of one another. Of course this could also mean that they team up and become a more effective pair of predators..." "We'll cross that if it comes up," Godai noted, "So...you in for this gig? I can sweeten the pie if you like, throw in a few concessions if you need convincing." "What sort of concessions?" Soun asked, then stood rigidly to attention with eyebrows climbing to his hairline as he blandly stated, "That much?" "Hey, it's no less than the dowry I'd offer some guy who wanted to marry Kodachi in a conventional sense," Godai reasoned, "And when it comes to our daughters' futures, well...who can put a price on that? And besides, we're only doing it for a lark until we think of something better, right?" "B-But to engage them...they're both women..." Soun argued. "Hey, aren't you the guy who's offering his two older daughters to one guy?" Godai countered. "Um...you make a very good point," Soun blinked, "How did you hear about...?" "Your ladies were a little more forthcoming than I think even they meant to be," Godai explained, "So...is Saotome's boy such hot stuff that he can handle two women at the same time?" "Well," Soun said dubiously, "To tell the truth, I'm not sure if he's handling them or they are handling him..." he glanced uncomfortably towards the dojo, where he had "accidentally" discovered the threesome in the act of vigorous coitus and elected to retreat to the security of the house rather than to risk intruding on their interlude, even if Ranma did seem a bit overwhelmed at the degree of affection that Nabiki and Kasumi were lavishing upon him...and each other... "Heh, kinda figured it'd be that way," Godai chuckled, "So...you in or out on this one? I'd understand if you don't want to play along with pretending to be serious about this engagement business, especially if you think it might upset your ladies, since they tried putting me off by saying they'd have to consult with you about this..." "Really?" Soun remarked with a curious expression, what for him passed as almost thoughtful, "They said that?" "Well, Hitome thinks it's just a stalling tactic on their part, but I thought I'd fill you in so you'd have time to think things over before they tell you all about the 'Crazy Scheme' of Kuno Godai to hitch your daughter to another girl. Actually, I was thinking of seriously hitching Tatewaki to Akane, but they seemed hostile to the idea, so Hitome made the switch suggestion, and I agreed that it was a good one. How about you?" "So, Hitome said that did she?" Soun smiled again, "Interesting." "So, is that a yes or a no answer?" Soun seriously considered it. Like most Japanese men he fancied himself the Lord of his Castle and Master of his fate, but in reality he knew that it was the women in the family who did most of the work and who made most of the decisions. Rarely did Soun do anything without consulting with Kimiko, and though Trieste was nominally a "houseguest-slash-adopted sister" in their house, she still wielded considerable latitude, and decisions of her making generally stood as though she were the real ruler of the household. The chance to upset the ruling order, even symbolically, was altogether tempting, and it caused Soun to silently nod the more he thought it over. "All right then, I'm in," Soun replied, "Provided we give Akane and Kodachi the option of bowing out in the end in favor of more preferable suitors." "Agreed," Godai nodded, "Better to let the kids do most of the work anyway, then we'll know what to do about them. In the meantime, here's what I have in mind, and try remembering this, because this is how I want you to act when you see Kimiko-chan and Trieste..." Soun listened ad Godai outlined his plans, his smile increasing by the moment as he got the gist of the general outline. It was ingenious, fiendishly so, and Soun almost wept at the audacity of the proposal. Of course he reminded himself that it was for the good of his daughters so as to salve his ego and fatherly pride lest anyone think that he was taking advantage of the situation to connive to teach his women an abject lesson. Such a thing would be so petty as to be beneath any self-respecting Martial Artist, and Soun was nothing if not upright about his martial arts. The mere fact that he was playing a prank at the expense of his ladies was merely incidental since they could take a joke as well as the next pair of housewives, and just because Soun often felt a bit left out on their shenanigans, even taken for granted at times, had nothing to do with it, no way, not in the least. Still and all, the thought of what their expressions would be like when they heard the news from his end...well, that would be simply priceless, and what else was a dutiful husband to do if not to keep his women on the occasional short leash (just like they managed to do with him the other 24/7) just to liven things up a bit in the sleepy township known simply as Nerima... *** Akane walked like someone in a daze all the way back from the Kuno mansion, an expression easily matched by her reluctant companion, an equally stunned and quite dubious looking Kuno Kodachi. The two girls walked side-by-side without actually looking at one another, only stealing occasional glances out of the corner of their eyes as though one or both of them might bolt and run away at any second. What hung between them unspoken and unwanted was a little word that either girl found strange when applied to the other. Iinazuke. Behind them Kimiko and Trieste walked side-by-side with no less confounded expressions, the Jedi Knight and Tendo matron both having disquieted views about what had just happened during their visit with the Kunos. In plainest terms the two older women were stunned, which was saying a lot considering their usual mental resilience. At length Trieste finally managed to say, "Akane-chan...Kodachi-chan...I am so sorry. I had no sense that a thing like this would happen..." "You had no sense of it, Sensei?" Akane blurted out, turning another full glance towards Kodachi and wondering for the fiftieth time how she was going to explain this one to Ukyo and Shampoo. Kodachi was just as wary as she gave Akane a sharp look back, padding along silently and wondering why she was even going along with the whole crazy affair. Just being this near to Akane terrified her in ways that she could not put into concrete terms, and yet she meekly walked at the side of her predatory Tendo suitor, wondering how long it would take before Akane tried to put the moves on her and force Kodachi to yield in submission... "Kodachi-chan," Kimiko spoke directly to the other girl, "You mother and I are friends, and as such you know that I would never force you to do anything that was against your nature..." "Oh...it is quite all right, Auntie," Kodachi tried to sound light and casual but her voice shook as she spoke, betraying the nervousness that she was feeling, "If Sensei Trieste believes that I should train with you at your dojo, then I suppose that I could manage to get by with this...especially since my parents all but made it an order." "Your brother did not seem too happy about the matter," Trieste noted in dull understatement. "No, I fear not," Kodachi turned and stared resolutely at the sidewalk down which they were headed, "Tachi has always been a rather sensitive soul, and his concern for me would be quite touching were it not misplaced as I am perfectly able to look after my own welfare..." That was a bald-faced lie and everyone there could sense it, including Akane, who glanced at Kodachi again and sympathetically winced before asking, "Sensei...you know it can hardly be legal for two women to marry, no matter what Godai-san said regarding ancient Samurai traditions that predate the post-Meiji era. Maybe at one time it was legal for two women to be married..." "As you wish you could do with Kuonji-san?" Kimiko noted with a gentle smile of tacit understanding. Akane sighed again, "That's not the point, Mom...I mean, arranged marriages are barbaric anyway. We ought to be able to marry whoever we like without alienating both of our families, and I'll bet Kodachi here would rather marry Nabiki than me anyway..." "Are you now taking it upon yourself to speak on my behalf?" Kodachi responded archly. "You know what I mean," Akane grunted, "C'mon, Dachi...I like you and I think you're real sexy and all that, but I've got a thing going down in another area, and...I just don't need the hassles, okay? I mean, don't you have somebody you want to cuddle up with in the middle of the night?" "Um...yes, several," Kodachi glanced away and pretended to take interest in the local flora and fauna, thinking of the girls on her Gymnastics team of whom she was particularly fond, and the way that she delighted in getting them down on their knees and begging for her mercy... "There, you see?" Akane turned back to her mother and teacher, "Forcing us to get engaged like this isn't fair to Kodachi, let alone to me. I mean, she's a pretty hot number and I'm sure she has guys she has to beat off with a club chasing her cute ass, but..." "Would you mind not talking like that in my presence?" Kodachi asked with a bit of frost in her tone and expression. "Huh?" Akane glanced at the other girl in puzzlement, "Like what?" "Like you were some common guttural snipe from the sewers without an ounce of breeding to your credit," Kodachi responded almost imperiously, "You describe me in terms that make me sound like some cheap fleshpot from the Shinjuku district, but I happen to be a lady..." "Well, yeah, I kinda noticed that," Akane said dryly, adding with a faint leer, "And I already know those are real and not falsies you're wearing, and you're pretty tight where it counts when take a finger, wet it, then stick it up your..." "Enough!" Kodachi declared, almost shivering as mental images formed that belied her pretended indifference, "It is plain why this could never work even if you were the right gender. You speak your mind a bit too freely and you don't edit your thoughts, you just blurt out whatever comes to mind in regards to me. Well, I expect a lot more than that from the person with whom I am expected to be in a mature relationship, and how Kuonji can stand to put up with you...well, no, I suppose it's not such a big mystery seeing as she is as much---if not more---of a Tomboy as you appear to be..." "Tomboy, huh?" Akane regarded the dark haired girl beside her, favoring her with a curious blend of irritation and amusement, "So what do you call a Gymnast who breaks into the rooms of other girls and tries to beat them up so they won't compete with her during your matches? Is winning by default your idea of behaving like a lady?" Kodachi glanced away at this as if lacking a good response line, and into the silence that followed this both girls seemed to silently take a new appraisal of one another, even as Trieste and Kimiko exchanged looks of their own that wordlessly conveyed their sentiments on this matter. **You know,** Kimiko tentatively began, **Hearing them talk this way...they could almost make a very nice couple...** **Mother!** Akane at once broke in with a telepathic protest. **Your mother means well, Akane-chan,** Trieste replied, **But let us reserve mention of this matter until we discuss it with your father. Hopefully he will help us put right this business so that we can go back to your regular training. In the meantime, treat Kodachi nice and consider her as you would a fellow student...** **A fellow student?** Akane protested, **She isn't even properly Force trained, Sensei!** **That is why we should conduct the rest of this discussion audibly,** Trieste replied, then accompanied thoughts with deeds by saying, "Let us hope that matters can be set right when we inform your father about these events, Akane- chan. Until then, Kodachi-chan, please consider yourself our guest and a new initiate student for our dojo, if you wish to accept our teachings." "You mean you wish to teach me as you did Tatewaki?" Kodachi asked, "This mysterious Force that you and my mother talk so often about?" "No, I'm afraid that would not be too prudent at this stage of your development," Trieste replied, "The Force requires a balance of mind and body that you do not presently possess, Kuno-san, though perhaps with some intensive training in mind and body integration you could gain a new understanding of the workings of the Force as you already apply it in your martial arts routines. There are limits beyond which it would not be safe to teach you, just as there is for your brother, who is not the master of his own emotional complex. If anything I believe that I taught too much to Tatewaki, more than he could handle given his outbursts just now and the difficulty he was evidencing in controlling his impulses." "Why is that really important, Sensei?" Akane asked, "What you said before about strong emotions..." "Emotions are an essential part of harnessing and controlling the Force, Akane- chan," Kimiko explained for the benefit of the two younger women, "The intellect can only work so far in channeling the energies of the mind and body, but emotions are what give the will its true power and focus. You approach the Force with a clear heart and a clean mind, operating with clear intentions not interrupted by negative influences. To wield the Force as a Jedi Master is not a halfway measure..." "A Jedi must always be wary of strong emotions precisely because they can overmaster your will and turn even the most perfect intentions into results you did not imagine," Trieste explained, "Anger, Fear and Hate are complex emotions that create disharmony and imbalance, destroying the balance that is needed for a Jedi to walk in state with the Light, leaving one open and vulnerable to influence by the Dark side." "I've often wondered about that," Kodachi remarked, "My mother...she had such difficulties when I was little, but then you came along and she changed for the better. I've never really understood how you achieved this, Auntie...um...Sensei?" "Well, it wasn't easy, I assure you," Trieste replied, "There are no easy solutions to life, but your mother proved to be an able student for the things I had to teach her, and once I showed her the way she did the rest for herself. All living beings have the inherent ability to heal themselves, Kodachi-chan, when they are afflicted by a disturbed and fragmentary mindset...much like a computer whose operating system has flaws that require patching back together." "With a machine you would reboot and reload damaged software," Kodachi noted, "But a human being is far more complex than any other type of machine..." "Indeed," Trieste noted with approval, "If you are intelligent enough to understand that, then perhaps you might appreciate the process that I used to help your mother flush away her fears and realize her own inner beauty. Many societies and cultures are familiar with the concept that is called the Rapture, a mystical phenomenon by which a person directly experiences their own higher consciousness in what is also known as Satori, and in that moment of heightened awareness one is directly open to the Force and its flow throughout the universe. The sensation is transitional and only lasts for a few minutes, but in that time one can become renewed in spirit and gain a connection to the Universe at large that remains with you long after you return to normal consciousness. An empathic bond is formed through integration of the mind and soul, and while you do regain the ability to function normally in society, you also retain that bond for as long as you walk in grace with those around you." "Is it hard to achieve this state, Sensei?" Akane asked. "Oh, not hard, Akane-chan," Trieste replied, "Not at all. What it involves is surrendering the ego to the will of the Force, which is only as difficult as you make it since not everyone can trust that easily or surrender their ego without also letting go of the things which they most value. Your sisters both have experienced Satori at different times...though with Kasumi the act of surrender comes more naturally than for Nabiki. You experienced it once yourself when you were younger, but it is a difficult mindset to hold onto since it requires no effort, and this universe provides far too many distractions that tempt us away from the path of grace towards self-absorption with the illusion of the Maya." "Maya, a Sanskrit word meaning Illusion," Kodachi fathomed, "The concept that the Universe of form is but a dream created in the mind of the Buddha..." "That is an excellent summary," Trieste nodded with approval, "We Jedi believed that the universe of substance that we feel and observe with our crude senses is only an illusion insofar as solid matter being nothing more than a projection of the Force itself in a more finite aspect. Atoms are nothing more than packets of quantum energy that project tiny force-fields, and linked together in molecular chains these force fields are what comprise the larger clumps of matter that we can observe with the eye or detect with our other senses. Such objects are generally quite permeable by the Force itself, and so we largely ignore them, concentrating upon what is Real and less on what is Illusion." "I don't know if I can do that, Sensei," Akane replied, "I mean...look at everything as just a bunch of energy fields. I know that we can feel the Force a lot stronger when we're surrounded by living things, but inanimate matter just feels kinda spongy. I like living energy when it's packaged nicely..." "So we have noticed," Kimiko remarked with a wry glance towards Kodachi, allowing herself a moment to admire the younger girl's compact, well-curved body before reminding herself that she was old enough to be the girl's body, then glancing at Trieste, whose body she was altogether familiar with and with whom she felt much closer than any sister. "I'm not asking you to ignore the different values of the world of materialism and living essence, Akane-chan," Trieste explained, "But please take into consideration the fact that all physical matter is but transitional energy. Atoms form when Quantum energy is shaped by a universal constant into a static field, and if you alter the constant even slightly you can release that energy into different forms, both destructive and constructive. That is the power that a true Jedi wields, far more spectacular than the simple Telekinetic tricks and mind games that you know how to facilitate. That is why it is dangerous for a Jedi to stray from the path and leave themselves vulnerable to temptation. The Dark side lurks in the shadows waiting to lure us down the path of such destruction as you could not imagine, and it is very easy to mistake that path for one of righteousness if you do not perceive the cause and effect behind your own actions." "I...don't quite get it," Akane admitted. "I do," Kodachi glanced over her shoulder and said, "Mother says the path to the Dark side is quick and easy, a way of expediency and opportunism rather than formed of sacrifice and hard work. Rather like skipping ahead to the ending of a novel rather than to cross the path written out on every page in order to get to the ending. I never quite understood what my mother meant before...yet you say this is the means by which you cured her of her affliction?" "I only showed Hitome the path and guided her the first few leagues," Trieste replied, "She did the rest for herself because she wanted to change, to become a better person. She knew inwardly that what she was doing before was hurting you deeply but she could not stop herself because of her inner demons and compulsions. Now you carry inner demons of your own as a consequence of her actions, Kodachi, and no one has shown you a better way to live just yet. That is why your mother has asked me to guide you on the same path that she has taken, to show you a way of life that is not haunted by inner voices, where you can actually feel good about yourself and not have to resort to cheating in order to prove your worth before others." "If...if you can show me what you did for my mother...I would be grateful," Kodachi admitted. "And it would be both my honor and my privilege," Trieste nodded in satisfaction, pausing to glance on ahead before she added, "There was a time early in the history of the Jedi when we were not quite as structured in our beliefs and it was thought that everyone could be their own inner guide on the path to enlightenment, much as your Buddhists tend to think upon your world. We discovered the hard way that letting a seeker stray on the path without guidance leads to serious complications, and as a little knowledge can be dangerous, so too do the Jedi arts carry within them the potential for cataclysmic effects if put towards unfavorable ends. A Jedi who takes the easy path often comes to a very bad end, and one who squanders their arts in mindless self-indulgence is her own worst enemy. Such is the path that was taken by the Sith when they first reared their ugly heads and attempted to subvert the natural order. At great cost were the Sith put down, but the results of that struggle caused the Jedi Council to be formed to guard against a return of the Sith, and to insure that Jedi Knights were never again so tempted." "But you said the Council doesn't exist anymore," Akane pointed out. "That is correct," Trieste nodded, "I am the last living member of the Council, at least to the best of my awareness. As such I can give testimony to how the good intentions we set out to achieve went so badly awry, when one of us set down the harsh Oath that Jedi were to swear renouncing all strong emotions such as Anger, Fear, Hate and even Love..." "Love?" both Akane and Kodachi reacted with a start. "Yes...love," Trieste sighed, "Such was our folly, such was our fate. We believed that Love was as dangerous to us as Fear and Hate because it is the most intense emotion that can be felt by any living being. The Council at the time was governed by a S'lilth, a race of reptilian origins, to whom the concept of romantic love was utterly unknown, and procreation was largely a function to be performed rather than enjoyed. In what amounts to an act of monumental chauvinism he convinced the other members of the council at the time to go along with his total ban on all intense emotions, hoping by this means to suppress the urge to follow the path of the Dark side. A code of strict poverty was enforced and all Jedi had to renounced material possessions beyond those needed for basic survival, living like monks without homes or families to weigh upon us, always at liberty to move about and lay down our lives if necessary for the good of others. Much as your renunciate orders here on Earth we believed that we could function on the pure emotions of altruism and compassion while ignoring distractions that might cause us to drift towards any sort of emotional attachment. A Jedi, it was believed, should only be concerned with the preservation of life as a healer, taking life only when necessary, and never to act from baser emotions such as avarice and greed. In a word, to live like monks and to function like robots, even to the point where some rather arrogantly presumed that we could be interchanged like components in some greater machine, a folly that was in part what led to the Clone Wars, which in turn brought about our eventual destruction." "But how could that be, Sensei?" Akane asked, "If the Jedi were so powerful..." "Power is nothing without the wisdom to know how to use it, Akane-chan," Trieste replied, "And out mistake was in forgetting that emotions are not something you can so easily banish or even regulate without consequences. A young man, one whom I have named to you before, came to an impasse in his life where he had to choose between his Jedi oath and the power of his own heart. He...chose badly...and he went over to the Dark side, and like an angry wrath he turned his vengeance upon us for suppressing his need and causing the eventual loss that he suffered, turning him into a creature of hate and wrath who then sought out other Jedi and eliminated other members of our order." "How awful," Kodachi said in sympathy. "Yes, it was a terrible lesson in the folly of thinking that we could banish humanity from human consciousness," Trieste replied, "I learned from this abject lesson that some emotions only become more intense the harder you seek to bury them, that Love is a universal Force unto itself, and that we were born to be companions to one another, to feel the love that we share for other living beings and not seek to deny our pure emotions. Love is a positive aspect of the Force...you cannot get more pure than love when it is expressed free of jealousy, fear or baser desires. Agape in its highest essence is the true Satori we experience when two souls merge together into a union...even more in group marriages, which were quite common on my home planet. In effect I returned to my roots and finally accepted my own humanity when I became an exile on your world. Kimiko-chan and Soun helped me to discover my lost humanity, and Kasumi taught me the way in which one can be both a Jedi and a Woman. Her example inspired me to rethink a great many assumptions that once were accepted canon among the Jedi Council, particularly with that old toad who acted as wise father to all of us, Yoda," she smiled in remembered fondness. "One cannot live their lives as if Love does not exist, my friend," Kimiko smiled gently, "That was the mistake your people made, trying to keep the lid on the emotions of a teenager, which any mother could have warned you is a recipe for failure." "So noted," Trieste smiled serenely, "However, this is where we come back to your recent behavior, Akane-chan. It is one thing to acknowledge love and lust in a healthy sense of self-expression, it is quite another thing when you overindulge and carry a thing to the point of pure obsession." "Ah..." Akane winced. She had rather hoped that her Sensei would have forgotten all about that for the moment. "And you, young lady," Trieste addressed herself towards Kodachi, "Cheating to obtain your desires is exactly the sort of misbehavior that I was describing before. You need to learn what it truly means to act like a lady and show respect for your own teaching." "Um...ah..." Kodachi also glanced away to hide her own wince, realizing then and there that she was in for some very extensive and methodical lessons in behavioral modification. "Ah, home at last," Kimiko said brightly, "Now we can get to the bottom of this nonsense Godai cooked up and have Soun-chan render the whole matter moot and academic..." "One moment," Trieste paused at the gates and glanced towards the rear area of the compound, remaining silent for a few seconds before nodding, "Well...the wards are in place around the dojo, rather what we expected. It seems that Kasumi followed our advice after all and talked Ranma and Nabiki into joining her for the Siege Perilous." "You mean...?" Kimiko asked rather hopefully. "I believe so," Trieste replied, "Since I have not been able to monitor her thoughts for the past hour, I would assume that Kasumi is doing much as she did when she initiated Shampoo into the Jedi arts. Normally I would be concerned, but since we have agreed that it is long since time that those three resolve the air of sexual tension that has existed between them almost from the onset of their first meeting..." "Huh?" Akane blinked, "You mean...? Ewwww!" "What is it?" Kodachi asked, glancing from one party to the other, "What is transpiring within your dojo?" "Oh, nothing much," Kimiko said airily with a smile, "My daughters are just making sure that their future husband is compatible with the both of them, nothing much to be concerned about either way." "Once before, when Kasumi was just a bit younger," Trieste began, "She took it upon herself to show Shampoo the means of achieving Satori by using the Siege Perilous as her guide...only...she discovered the hard way that there were unforeseen...complications that result from the use of the Siege in such a manner. That is why the Council forbade using the technique at anything but the more advanced stages of one's training, when one would theoretically have the emotional maturity to resist its influence as it is a technique which lowers inhibitions and removes the normal restraints that we all have in place to regulate our behavior and impulses. The Siege acted upon the innocent altruism of my apprentice and removed the barriers of culture and upbringing that separated her from Shampoo, leaving two very excited and sexually innocent teenagers to explore the curious sensations that took over their awareness. One thing led to another, and by the end of the encounter Shampoo and Kasumi were a lot closer together as students of the way, and for a brief time they were even Oath Sisters, the next best thing to being married." "Married?" Akane blinked, "Shampoo...and Kasumi?" "Fortunately the oath was not the binding sort that constitutes true Amazon marriage," Trieste continued, "And, at any rate, they were both too young to be settling down like that. There was still so much that Kasumi had to learn, but as a result of her sharing, Shampoo became a Force Master and was able to study under her great-grandmother's watchful supervision. The experience effected a great change in her own personality since she used to be a rather arrogant sort, always ready to rub a defeated opponent's nose in the mud while disparaging those she regarded as weaker than herself. It pleases me greatly to see what a fine young woman she has started to mature into, and one day she might even make an excellent Jedi. Something to consider at any rate, though it may also be that the Force has a different fate in mind for her. Time can only tell one way or another." "Yeah, well...whoever she settles down with is gonna be a lucky person," Akane sighed, "Shampoo's terrific, and I can see a little why Oneechan would have liked her...but...Ranma? And Nabiki?" "You don't think your sister is good enough for a man, Akane?" Kimiko gently teased. "No, that's not it at all, Mom!" Akane protested, "I just mean...why him? Why with Kasumi?" "The decision was for your sisters to make," Trieste replied, quirking her lips into a tentative smile before adding, "Although the main choice, I believe, was Kasumi's. The Siege will tell if they are truly compatible or not and whether it is wise to pair them into a group scene, two wives for one husband. Not all teenagers have the wisdom and maturity to understand what all is involved in forming such a sacred circle...in point of fact, most societies make allowances for such things, but the marriage is usually decided by the parents. In recent times the practice of arranged marriage has fallen into disfavor, though, so we...elected to give your sisters this option to see for themselves if it is the path that Fate has chosen." "And the real test won't even come until after the sex has run its course," Kimiko smiled as she tried to imagine the sight of her two daughters making out with Ranma, only to have her view blocked out by the barriers surrounding the dojo, "When the effect of their hormones no longer affects their judgement, then they should be clear-minded enough to make their own decisions in a more rational sense. I wish that I could be there to offer them counsel...but you're right, Sister, this is something they have to work through on their own for better or for worse." "That is as it must be," Trieste said before starting forward once again, "Come, Soun is in the back, and he is alone. Nodoka and Genma must have returned to their own home. We should be able to discuss matters fairly evenly without too much distraction." When they got to the house itself, however, they were surprised to find Soun waiting for them with a pleasantly beaming expression. As Soun was not given to smiling very often, this disturbed his ladies greatly, the more so when he looked at their newest guest and said, "Why, is this Kuno Kodachi? Splendid to meet with you at last, young lady! Your father called and gave me the good news, so I suppose I should get used to calling you daughter, yes?" "Eh?" Kodachi blinked, wondering if she should follow her instincts and turn around to flee very fast. After all, one never knew what it would be like to share a domicile with such an obvious madman... "Dad?" Akane reacted with dismay, unprepared as she was for **this** type of a fatherly reaction. "Akane," her father was at once both stern and lordly, "You take good care of your iinazuke. I want you to respect and cherish one another, and to be mindful that she comes from a good family, so you will behave like a lady around her and not bring shame upon this household." "Soun-chan," Kimiko said uneasily, "Are you feeling well?" "You already know about the engagement?" Trieste asked, coming as near as anyone had seen her approach complete dismay at this particularly favorable reaction. "Know about it?" Soun asked mildly, "I'm ecstatic! My little girl is settling down at last to raise her own family, and after I'd all but given up hope...ah well. Never mind, we can discuss the details later, but for now I'd like the chance to get to know you better, young lady. After all, if you and Akane are to be engaged..." "Engaged?" Kodachi asked, looking very close to fainting on the spot. "Come along, inside everyone," Soun cheerfully urged as he turned about and retreated back into the house, leaving the four women at the doorstep to collectively blink their eyes with a huge sweatdrop. Kimiko turned to Trieste and said, "Does it seem to you as if Soun-chan may be up to something?" "I definitely have that impression," Trieste replied, "And since we both know that Soun-chan has all the subtlety of a lead brick...I think we should get to the bottom of this at once." "I completely agree," Kimiko replied, turning to a stunned Akane and Kodachi before saying, "Come along, dears, and be careful what you say as your father does not quite seem to be himself at the moment. I'm sure we'll have everything sorted out in a few more minutes, depending on whether or not Soun-chan can make a sufficiently satisfying account for his rather odd behavior just now. Akane just stood where she was for another few seconds before casting another wary glance at her "iinazuke," seeing the same degree of uncertainty was mirrored in Kodachi's eyes, further tempered by a degree of anxiety that was rather hard to place. Akane wanted to do something to reassure the other girl that she was not about to bite her, but instead just sighed and followed her mothers into the house, followed a moment later by an even more reluctant Kodachi... Neither one of them noticed the shadow that flitted from the gateway to the street at large, nor did they hear Taro's faintly murmured comment, "Iinazuke, huh? Since when did that happen? This definitely bears a closer examination, but first I'd better check in with the Boss and let him know what I just found out about the Tendos..." With that purpose in mind he turned and started back down the way from which he had come, unaware that he, too, was being observed by a pair of watchful eyes, following with a soft chuckle to himself as he said, "So, the boy thinks he can set his mark on that little cutie, eh? Well, she's a mighty fine package all right, but what's this stuff about engagements? Doesn't anybody believe in good old honest fooling around anymore? Does it always have to be so serious? I tell you, young people these days and their romantic notions..." He paused as he glanced at the dojo then smiled, "Well, at least those three have the right idea. Now if only they'd show that much consideration for a poor old man who hasn't had much lately...ah well. Ranma, my boy, you don't know how lucky you are having cuties who are that eager to please you. Most girls won't even look at you right and proper unless you get down on your knees and sweet talk 'em. Ah...for the old days when I was still a man of youthful prospects..." With that thought in mind the ancient pervert made a leap towards the house, intending to listen in on the juicy gossip about what the youngest of the Tendo siblings had been up to this time, and from the indications he had seen so far, Happosai judged that this would be a particularly juicy encounter. Nothing livened up his ancient, perverse way of thinking like hearing about the latest travails of the talented young Akane, a nice girl with the best of intentions who could hardly be faulted for liking poontang over beefcake, and in Happosai's opinion more girls should be just like her in that regard since most men were sleazes in the not-so-humble opinion of the Anything Goes master. No respect for a lady, it was simply shocking to his way of thinking, but at least that Akane stood up for herself and didn't take crap from anybody. Happosai could really respect that in a lady, even if he still intended to steal every bit of lingerie in her possession, just for the principle of the thing, of course... And meanwhile, back in the dojo, a trio of amorous teenagers continued about their lustful ways quite oblivious to these proceedings and blissfully unaware of the storm that was about to descend upon their dojo... Continued. Comments/Criticisms/The Superstring Theory of Karma: shadowmane@ridgenet.net Ranma, Nabiki and Kasumi have a serious discussion in the aftermath of their orgy, and Akane is forced to **explain** herself to Ukyo and Shampoo, and yes, the Golden Pair will be in there somewhere, so strap on your skates and make ready for the Ice Storm in, "Frosty Relations," or, "To Have or Have Knots!" Be there! X -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- If you wish to check out my other works, Please check out my Fanfiction webpage at: http://s11.sexshare.com/~jbader/jimbader.html All related chapters of this series can be found there along with my other works.