I have received some complaints about the heavy access to this site. Therefore I changed the theme of the site and you will notice some small changes here and there. However, after the change two weeks ago, I decided to switch back to my old theme. In order to make it easier to access, I kept all the changes I made for the previous theme. The most significant change is on the pages. I have deleted all the sub-pages such as ‘on theology’ and ‘flammers paradise’ and put them inside the home page instead. I also put all the video from youtube in the full page of the thread - this means you have to click ‘continue reading‘ to see the video. Thank you for your feedbacks. I hope that it would be easier to access this blog now.Enjoy reading and please do leave your comments … Have a great day everyone!

Disclaimer: Although most of the things here were written because they really happened, they are not necessarily happened to me unless I put them under the category “about me”. Some of the articles were written because of the stories that others told me, my imagination, friend’s requests, emails, etc.

February 27th, 2008!

‘             Two weeks ago I received a letter saying that I was called to follow my last vicariat training on April 15-25, which leads to my last ministerial test to become ordained as a full pastor of HKBP Church. Therefore, I’m going back to Indonesia on April 9th, and return to the Amsterdam on May 29th.

‘             This ordination was the main purpose of all my theological studies. This is a very important moment for me. To be honest, I wasn’t expecting the calling this year. I asked one of my senior pastors about whether I will be called this year or not, and he said no. But then again, I was called. My dad told me that he received a letter about it. At first I was not so sure about the calling, I thought it could be an administrative error, but after I saw my name on the church’s website, I am now convinced. I wonder what I would look like with my black robe on?
‘             I need encouragement and support as I’m following the path that I felt was destined for me. Despite all the worries and problems I have now; i.e. my 2nd chapter, my living permit extension, housing contract extension, the ministerial test,
I believe God has plans for me. I just need to do my best and God will take care the rest. If you’re back home in Jakarta, or North Sumatera, there’s a big chance I would be able to meet you all! Hope to see you soon!

Well, since I love travelling that much.. so I decided to have a “wish-to-visit” list on my account so I know what kind of places that I’ve never been and that I would like to travel next…. ok, here we go:

Domestic Travel: Ambon, Poso, Pontianak, Singkawang, Kupang, Komodo Island, Nias, Aceh, Balikpapan, and last but not least: Manado.

International Travel: San Siro stadion in Milan, South Africa, New York, New Zealand, Liverpool, Barcelona, Frankfurt, one of the Nordic countries, Sao Paulo or Buenos Aires, Transylvania, Bangkok, Manila, and last but not least: Boston (again… )

7 July 2007

Need to add some more on the international travel list: London, Nottingham, Praha, Cairo, India, and removing Boston from the list hehehe

18 September 2007

I bought a new camera Canon Powershot S3-IS in Boston, and loving it ever since. I kinda knew that I had this passion on photography since high school but never had the will to give it a go. Now, with my new camera (amateur camera) I can fulfil this long forgotten hobby… Here are some of my pictures at Flickr. Well, not all of these pictures were taken by my new camera, others than pictures in Boston were taken with different digital camera. Read the rest of this entry »

When you pray about someone you feel very close to them. There is this connection in a prayer that I can’t explain that gives you peace and sometimes I literally smile while mentioning them.

Read the rest of this entry »

Which one would you prefer me doing? hahahaa (pasti ada yg mo komen bilang maruk!!!)

Yesterday, I received an email on my flickr account regarding one of the photos I put there. It turns out that it was short-listed for inclusion of Schmap Boston Guide. Not bad for an amateur like me! While they don’t offer any payment whatsoever, but I’m quite happy with the terms they offered. Lets keep the fingers crossed. Here is the picture of the Dragon Boat Race near Harvard that they wanted to publish. This was taken with my lovely Canon Powershot S3IS that I bought in Boston.

And this is their email:

Hi binsar,

I am writing to let you know that one of your photos has been short-listed for inclusion in the fourth edition of our Schmap Boston Guide, to be published early February 2008.

http://www.schmap.com/shortlist/p=10076372N03/c=SF2013632

Clicking this link will take you to a page where you can:
i) See which of your photos has been short-listed.
ii) Submit or withdraw your photo from our final selection phase.
iii) Learn how we credit photos in our Schmap Guides.
iv) Browse online or download the second edition of our Schmap Boston Guide.
Read the rest of this entry »

‘        I just lost my whole finished chapter one yesterday. Well, it was not really yesterday because I’ve been trying to retrieve all the data in the file since last week by sending it to couple of friends. It didn’t work out. They said, “Bin, datanya emang udah ga bisa diselamatkan, makro nya kaya kena virus deh.” Yes, I kinda suspect the virus that has been spreading in Casema internet service for Duwo. I saw an announcement last week about it. I hope that it is the only file that got infected. I lost the file!!!!!!!!!!!! %#^$@(#*@*!)@)#*&!

‘        I forgot to back up the file. It was the result of my hard work before and after new year!!!!!!! But anyways, I have learned my lesson. I should always back up my file. I still have some files that have not been edited and still in pieces. Now, I need to do it all over again. I hope I can do it within this week. I really need some encouragement right now… sigh… I’ve been thinking about it and it made me a bit frustrated and now, I’m having trouble sleeping. Lucky I am chatting with someone on Yahoo Messenger right now. Someone I just knew, a cutie hahaha…

Happy new year everyone!

I’ve been away for quite sometime, and I was very busy doing a lot of stuff during Christmas and New Year. I was working at the church as custodian, preparing christmas, and was busy rehearsing for the service as well. Then I went to Hamburg for the New Year celebration. I just got back yesterday and was already busy preparing a short reflection for a family service last night. I am back and ready to start running full speed on my writing. But before I write some more stuff on this blog, let me tell you my new year’s resolutions.

1. Write chapter 2, 3, and 4 within this year.

2. Be more responsive with my emails.

3. Write emails to the people I haven’t managed to reply or contact last year.

4. Take a Dutch course.

5.  Practice more on drummin’ especially on the motion and fingering.

6.  IYF should be my main concern as well.

7. Less time hanging around on Facebook and Friendster.

8. Never forget my Bible Reading.

9. Wiser on spending.

10.  More humble.

11.  mmm…. 5 kg less hahahaha

12. Stop shopping. I’ve got enough materials now for 3 years.. yippiee

13.  Maybe… and maybe… find someone new hahaha

That’s it. Of course I still have more stuff on friendship, traveling, ordination, and stuff, but they will come gradually. Those things I listed up there are the things that I really want to achieve within this year. So, let’s focus and make it happen! Cayo!

KRT means royal descendant of a kingdom in Java who still exist until today. Yap, that’s right, I became royal for 3 hours hahaha. Yesterday, 19 Dec, I attended a doctoral public defense of Rev. Dr. Bambang Subandrijo at the Vrije Universiteit, Amsterdam. I was his paraname. He got the privilege to use his own traditional costume, which is Javanese instead of the traditional tuxedo like the tradition of a doctoral examination at the VU. He defended his thesis on “Eikon and Ayat: Points of Encounter between Indonesian Christian and Muslim Perspectives on Jesus.” Read the rest of this entry »

I remembered a conversation I had with some friends about the 5 things that I’m looking for in a woman. Here they are:

1. I would love to be with a woman who will be able to argue me and give reasonable explanations for that.

2. I would love to be with a woman who is independent yet can be spoiled at times.

3. I would love to be with someone who is family oriented and still has her own career and dream, and she should keep pursuing it.

4. I would love to be with someone who loves me just the way I am.

5. We both should be able to complete each other in our goals in life.

Mmm, of course there are things that are not mentioned above such as kind, understanding, loving, caring, can be a bit grumpy (not much hehehe), and romantic. These are tough stuff, but no one is perfect and me neither! What about you?

There is little chance that you will find a Batak (a tribe in North Sumatera, Indonesia - me too) anywhere in the world, partying and hanging around with friends during new year’s eve. I can hardly remember when was the last time I have fun with friends during new year’s eve. Probably never.

We have an unwritten tradition, for every Christian Batak, to gather with family during the change of the year. Gathering with family does not mean your own nuclear family, this means gathering with your extended family. We will have a small prayer and reading the bible together exactly at the 00.00 o’clock. During the small prayer, we will have a chance to say something - some words - could be words of appreciation of what had happened or apologizing for the things that went wrong during the previous year. All of the family members usually have their turns to say what they want to say. Then we will, in turn, apologize each other for what had happened the previous year. The idea is to start the new year with a fresh heart and a prayer. Then afterwards we will commit the first sin of the year, drinking and poker gambling hahaha…. (just kidding). Read the rest of this entry »

I have to promote this Indonesian teen movie because my sister is acting in it hahaha… She didn’t play the leading role, only a small part, but I guess it’s quite ok since I haven’t seen the movie myself hahaha… She’s getting there… aren’t you sis?? She acted already in some movies, and her role is getting bigger all the time… hahaha… Ok, her name is Ruth Damaihati Pakpahan, preferred to be called Iyuth. I think, my family is getting into this art thingy…. hahaha… First it was my sister, then my dad also launched his own Batak songs album… Here’s a piece of the story…

Read the rest of this entry »

Guess what!

I’m not officially working there anymore (read: Working at Restaurant Selecta). The CWI (Dutch authority in charge for working permit) did not allow me to work in Selecta since last month. The accountant of the restaurant said,

gisteren zijn wij gebeld door CWI, in verband met aanvraag tewerkstellingsvergunning Pakpahan.

Deze wordt niet verleend. Reden is dat Pakpahan geen student is.
Op zijn verblijfsdocument staat vermeld “arbeid in loondienst” .Dit slaat op zijn onderzoekswerk bij de universiteit.

blablabla… then…

Dus helaas, deze meneer kan geen werknemer worden van Selecta B.V.

Wat jammer!

Anyhoo, all is good. I was surprised that the timing was perfect when I really need some break to start writing. Then these last couple of weeks I was helping there again. I will not work there anymore since I don’t have a working permit and I don’t want to risk my chance of studying here just to get some extra euros. The good news is that my work permit for the Crossroads International Church was granted. So, I am now working every saturday and sunday at the church, with bigger rate per hour hahahaha…

These couple of weeks, I met new friends at Selecta: Okki, Ferry, and Oscar. I also met the ‘old timers’ such as Arief, Intan, Sally, Oppie, Mira, Ralph, Sylvi, Etta, and fulltimers such as Jessy, Jere, Leo, Salomon, and ofcourse Tante Roos.

Here are some new and old pictures of the ’slaves’ hahahaha… gonna miss them - i think [ *} wink wink

I want to share a bit about why I am here and what is my purpose in life. I was born and raised as Christian. Before I was born, my dad had made a vow to God that he would give his first child to God as his servant. He did this as an act of gratitude of God’s grace. When I was a child I was happy to tell everyone that I want to be a pastor. But then when I was in high school I realized that being a pastor was not a cool dream. I was in a band (I played the lead guitar back then), partying, being the kind of person with so many friends, and to become a pastor is the least coolest thing I want to be. Then I had doubts about my future especially because I was thinking about pursuing other career, becoming a lawyer for instance. But then I realized that God always set the course in my life. God pulled me off whenever I tried to set my own course in life. When my band was about to sign a possible contract with some local clubs in Jakarta, I broke my arm in a motorbike accident. I couldn’t play the guitar for sometime. Then my cousin told me that I will not be able to play guitar as fast as I wanted anymore because one of the nerves on my arm was not working properly anymore. Then I had to decide to which college I have to go. I decided to go to theological seminary while taking the test for a state university. I passed both. But then somehow without hesitation I choose the theological seminary. Read the rest of this entry »

I was not feeling well today. I think I was too tired because I was doing so many things at the same time. As usual, my body told me that I needed rest, so I took some time to rest and I had a good sleep today. Its my birthday, the weather is great (according to Dutch weather standard), and I spent most of the time sleeping. Not an ideal way of celebrating one’s birthday ofcourse but I really needed that. I took some vitamins as well.

Today I met Saskia and Ephraim at Leidseplein. We had a small drink then I went home because I promised Enade that I will cook for dinner. It was a simple dinner but I love the chicken with cashew nut that I cooked. We had a good dinner, and I bought a South African white wine for the occasion. It was fantastic too. I still have Viennetta ice cream in my fridge that we couldn’t finish, I shall keep it for a good occasion later.

Now, I am sitting at my usual spot, turned off the lights, light on some candles, opened my curtain, and looked at Amsterdam clear view at night from my 7th floor room. I can see Amsterdam Arena clearly from here. While doing that I’m comfortably sipping my jasmine tea with honey (that I just received from someone as a birthday gift). It brings me some peace of mind. Enjoying the night view of Amsterdam and its lights with the candle lights dancing at the edge of my eye sight brings back a lot of memories. It occurs to me that I was doing the same thing 2 weeks ago plus my Latin playlist on my iTunes. Hmm… what is it with Friday? hehehe… Read the rest of this entry »

Well, today is my 27th birthday. I have lived for 27 years and I’m getting more mature. This is also my third time celebrating my birthday in Amsterdam. Hmm, years did fly fast. However, I feel grateful for all things that had happened in my life. One thing for sure, God is taking care of me in whatever things I do. I think God is arranging my life for me. If I would like to use a metaphor, my life is like a boat that has its course set already. I still don’t know what will happen on the way, but running on a GPRS and auto-pilot sometimes made me nervous. When I did, I would like to take over and when it happened I felt God was keeping me safe too. But whenever I went off course the auto pilot went back on instantly. So, this is my reflection on my life. Read the rest of this entry »

“When Will I see You Again” performed by Barry Manilow

Last night I waved goodbye; Now it seems years

I’m back in the city; Where nothing is clear
But thoughts of me holding you; Bringing us near; And tell me

When will our eyes meet?When can I touch you?
When will this strong yearning end?
And when will I hold you again?

Time in New England; Took me away

To long, rocky beaches; And you by the bay
We started a story Whose end must now wait
And tell me

When will our eyes meet?When can I touch you?
When will this strong yearning end?
And when will I hold you again?

I feel the change coming; I feel the wind blow
I feel brave and daring; I feel my blood flow

With you, I could bring out all the love that I have
With you, there’s a heaven so earth ain’t so bad
And tell me

When will our eyes meet?When can I touch you?
When will this strong yearning end?
And when will I hold you . . . . again?

Tonight, I feel so overwhelmed by the facts that God is taking good care of me. I know that I sometimes wanted to run away for a while, or complain and whine all the time, but once again God showed me that God indeed is taking care of me. H All I have to do is trust God and do my best for God will do the rest. He answered my financial cry, my questions on my relationship, and helped me found the right idea to write on my dissertation. I may not be the best servant God has, but I will try to leave my life in God’s caring hand and arrangement. As I was indeed crying for help, God talked to me. I heard this song on my computer, unexpectedly. I sang the song feeling, humble, awe, and great gratitude. God is taking good care of me.

Be not dismayed whate’er betide

Be not dismayed whate’er betide,
God will take care of you!
Beneath His wings of love abide,
God will take care of you!

God will take care of you,
Through every day o’er all the way;
He will take care of you;
God will take care of you!

Through days of toil when heart doth fail,
God will take care of you!
When dangers fierce your path assail,
God will take care of you!

All you may need He will provide,
God will take care of you!
Trust Him, and you will be satisfied,
God will take care of you!

Lonely and sad, from friends apart,
God will take care of you!
He will give peace to your aching heart,
God will take care of you!

No matter what may be the test,
God will take care of you!
Lean, weary one, upon His breast,
God will take care of you!

This was taken on September 28th, during PPI Amsterdam unofficial fast breaking. My first time seeing myself sing like this and being recorded without realizing it. I stopped when I knew that I was being recorded hahahaha… Thanks to Ardho!

oh, and I cooked some food too.. Read the rest of this entry »