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Love sought is good, but given unsought is better.
--- Shakespeare
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New Articles
hello..
hey hey..i am new at this...but it seems awesome sooo far...:P well i hope to get to know alot of peoples in here?!?!haha ok byes..
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hello..
hey hey..i am new at this...but it seems awesome sooo far...:P well i hope to get to know alot of peoples in here?!?!haha ok byes..
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*hEllO*
*taSte oF qUeEr miNnEsotA*...
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its more than that
Posted by chentao on Saturday, August 09, 2003 12:50 AM
posting for jen...since jen is such a great advertiser, shameless in her craft.
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"she's the one..." i said.
"who?" thu sat across from me, eating her rice with soy sauce again, usually too lazy to cook real food.
"siden..." i sighed.
thu looked at me with an incredulous look, she knows me to be frivolous with my picks, sort to say. "did something smack you upside your head when you fell out of your bed again?" she half laughed stuffing her face with rice.
i gave her a look that said, "shut up, just listen..." and i continued out loud, "she's everything that i need right now, and more. she's mad supportive of me and all of my ideas..."
"yeah," she shrugged, "but does she laugh at your stupid jokes or cry when you try to make one? girl, you said that about every girl you ever went out with, how am i suppose to take you serious. she might be what you want now, what about tomorrow? she's a replacement to you for Mua and you freakin' know it."
"thu...my mama julo, my shining star, my bitch that likes to slap my ideas and feelings around like it was..." she looked at me in a nonserious way and i just rolled my eyes, "lookie rookie, can't you just ask me why i think she's the one?"
"i thought we established that? she's a good **** to you." she kept stuffing her face in with rice.
i frowned, "i never said that."
she rolled her eyes again, "chen, when you talk about girls being what you want right now, it's not because of the funny tingly feelings that's happening in your chest, it's the funny tingly that's happening below your belly, but higher than your sagging pants, you horny butch."
i raised my hurt voice, "hey hey hey! i'm not a butch, i'm tomboyish, i got long hair...and...stuff."
she shook her head with a look that said, "you must be joking, cuz i'm not laughing." then she continued, "besides all of that, you have a bottomless pit full of your pervie thoughts and endless, insatiable wants. admit it, dumb a$, she's good for that stuff. you have no emotions what-so-ever. i don't think you've ever loved anyone ever in your life."
i was hurt beyond belief, she was right about most of it, but it just felt like she was accusing me wrongly about how i felt. she was the only person that knew me inside out and all about except for the intimacy that's shared between two lovers. she was my friend, and i thought she'd know me by now. undeniable that, siden was probably an infatuation, however, to assume that i have never loved anyone in my life, that was pure...it's just wrong.
having caught me silence, thu continued, "wah!? eh?" she looked at me tentatively with her chopsticks still in her mouth. "eh, don't go silent on me, you know that i'm blunt. i'm sorry if i hurt your feelings."
i looked at her solemnly, "i just thought you'd know me better than that. you know that i've loved before, but i'm afraid to get burned again."
she sighed, "there's no point in trying to have someone to replace that."
"it's not even that, i'm not looking for a rebound. can't i just look for a good **** and tell you that i've found one. lying to myself thus so, so i could just believe that i'm able to. you're the friend, couldn't i just say that i'm capable. i'm not looking for a replacement, i'm just looking to fill an empty thingy there. and you're just suppose to listen, not ostracize me..."
"ostracize, that's a little harsh." she said sarcastically.
"don't be my critic, when i'm already my own worst. don't condemn me when i'm trying my hardest to make a fool out of myself. jeez, thu, just let me tell my lie."
"are you done?" she said plainly with a bored tone.
i heaved and then finally sighed..."yeah." and shrugged.
"when are you going to see her again?" she began to finish her bowl.
"tonight, around eight, we're going to a strip joint."
she shook her head and said, "numb nut."
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