Understanding French Mentality
A Review by John Nesbit
01/15/2004
For years I've been fascinated by France and its culture—history, literature, cinema, cuisine, etc.—and had often dreamed of Paris. (There had to be some reason for those two years of suffering inadequacies in French courses and the only failing grade I ever received.) I'd heard numerous Americans cite the arrogance and rudeness of the French, yet I had to find out for myself. Besides, I've heard much the same about New Yorkers and found that to be greatly exaggerated. Sure enough, two weeks in Paris last summer confirmed what I suspected—Parisians are no more arrogant or rude than New Yorkers and are actually quite friendly (and I'm not just talking about the come-ons by the sleaze joints near Pigale where a scantily clad woman may grab your arm screaming “SEX” in English).
Other Americans that refuse to believe French stereotypes, think the whole “Freedom Fry” thing was idiotic, and sensitively listen and observe body language likely will find the French as wonderful as I did. But Jean-Benoit Nadeau and Julie Barlow have published an outstanding analysis of French culture in Sixty Million Frenchmen Can't Be Wrong that is essential reading for anyone planning to visit France and actually get along with the locals. Otherwise, Americans who carry on as they do in the States are almost certainly guaranteed to inadvertently insult or offend.
While I've heard a number of ethnocentric Americans seem shocked when visiting foreigners don't speak English, why should they expect to blather away in English when in Paris? I found that simply immediately saying “Bonjour,” followed by a simple query of “Parlez-vous francais?” was more than sufficient to ensure polite cooperation in any Parisian restaurant or business. Indeed, the authors confirm that greeting with “Bonjour” is highly expected—to neglect this formality confirms crass rudeness on your part and nearly guarantees shabby service. But it doesn't stop there.
French people may well test out new acquaintances by talking about art, food, and culture or broach controversial subjects like politics and religion, but woe to any American who immediately tries to get them to reveal their name or find out what they do for a living or money matters. They consider that a direct invasion of privacy. This apparent “privacy” gives many Americans the impression that the French are aloof, but they simply have different ideas about what kind of information you share with strangers. One example the authors cite occurs during a leisurely walk in a small town. They noticed a tree loaded with CDs to scare birds away from its fruit. Before long, they were talking with the owner about his fig tree, the contents of his garden, the history of the town complete with juicy political details, and were given a gift of fig jam. They never did exchange names.
The 350 page text explores many facets of French life and history, including Algiers, anti-Semitism and the German occupation, the French resistance, protests and revolution over the years, heavy Catholic influence, fascination with verbal eloquence, love of the land, socialistic economic philosophy, and its elitist education system. As a former teacher, I found their educational concepts fascinating. Based on national standards, uniformity across districts, and authoritative teachers, the pre-university French education system was founded by Napoleon. The ultimate academic goal that all ambitious parents want for their children are not to send them to universities (La Sorbonne being the only one with a modicum of respect), but to qualify for a highly selective grande école, by far the most prestigious being l'École National d'Administration.
People genuinely interested in other cultures and mindsets will find Sixty Million Frenchmen Can't Be Wrong very detailed and written with fine narrative flair, but anyone planning to visit France should put this on their “must read” list—it would make even more ideal reading on the flight over than studying French conversational material. It's true that the French do appreciate people who speak the language; however, it's even more important that visitors respect their culture and values. They really aren't the arrogant bastards that many Americans make them out to be. One HUGE difference in their mentality—civil servants are highly respected and they actually expect their government to work!
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