Commuter Charm School: Lesson 1
Written by Laurie C., Whitestone
Why hello, ma'am. That's a very nice handbag you have there. Is it designer, or Canal Street? Well, either way, it's lovely, but do you really think it needs its own seat on the train?
No, that's fine, I understand that when you got on six stops ago, the train was almost empty, and no one was standing yet. But when it started to get crowded in here, and you saw people jostling each other for a space at one of the poles, don't you think that might have been a good time to move your pretty purse from the luxurious comfort of its own personal seat to the more considerate spot of, I don't know, your lap?
You must be pretty resilient. I know you've noticed the people standing above you, eyeing your pampered purse with contempt and giving you serious death-glares. I like how you pretend not to see them, as if you had no clue that your handbag is obnoxiously taking up valuable commuter real estate.
I mean sure, someone who wanted the seat could just ask you to please move your bag. And someone who wanted the seat could also just, for example, sit on the bag. Oopsies! Didn't even see it there. Hope I didn't crush anything.
Also, some suspicious character could, without you even realizing it, steal away with your bag. Like what if -- Hey! Where did your bag go? Wasn't it just here? I could've sworn -- ha-ha! Just kidding. I have it, right here. Wasn't that a fun joke? I'm just saying; you should be more careful. Hold on to that bag a bit more closely. People on this train can be pretty crazy.
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