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Holy Shit!1!! Toronto Police say that ED is a force for good!!

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Heeeeeeeeeeeeey!

Thizz in peace, our hyphy overlord

Welcome to the Thizzlehat Junction Center. This is your place to mention news and anything needing adminly attention. You can also use the shortcut TJC.

While you wait for attention, have a listen. You can also read the ED News on our blog, get on IRC [1] and/or add us on MySpace.

About Encyclopedia Dramatica
Done in the spirit of Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary, Encyclopedia Dramatica's purpose is to provide a central catalog for the e-public to view parody and satire of drama, memes, e-pals and other interesting happenings on the Internets. Our goal is to provide comprehensive, reference-style parody, to poke fun at everyone and everything. You can read more about the origin of encyclopediadramatica in our About section.

Users
Anyone with a web browser is welcome to participate, as long as you read and agree to the General disclaimer. You are required to create an account to edit articles. Other than that, there are no requirements.

Ways to Help
If you have free time and would like to help out, here's a list of things that can be done:

• Check the Needed page. This is a list of articles we would like to see and information we'd like to find.
• Check the list of wanted articles. This is automatically generated when two or more pages contain links to a page that doesn't yet exist.
• Categorize articles. We have a list of existing categories and a list of uncategorized articles. To add an article to a category, click that page's edit link and at the bottom of the entry, type [[Category: Category Name]] (Where "Category Name" is the relevant approved, existing category) and click "Save Page". e-points if you mention what categories you added in the summary box.
• Expand on stubs - view Stub
• Rewrite crappy articles - view Crap
• Add images to articles - view Upload
• Eliminate dead-end pages by adding links to other articles - view Deadendpages
• Review {{opentasks}} to see if there is anything else that needs to be done.

[edit] Article Needed

New Zealand teenager accused of controlling botnet hacking of over 1 million computers and nearly $13 million in damages.Police questioned the suspected teenage kingpin of an international cyber crime network accused of infiltrating 1.3 million computers and skimming millions of dollars from victims' bank accounts

http://www.stuff.co.nz/thepress/4299825a24035.html http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/national/1106ap_cyber_attacks_arrests.html http://www.halflifesource.com/news/2007/11/30/article10262.htm

◄ € Zenophile ﮚ ► ◄ Ǽ Talk ▪ ĹŭĿž ► 12:55, 1 December 2007 (CST)

Extra Plus Bonus! It can now be disclosed that he's an Aspie!

• The mother of a Whitianga teenager with Asperger's syndrome allegedly involved in a multi-million dollar international cyber crime ring says she had no idea of her son's involvement in the ring.

--| »⇔«¿ 09:07, 4 December 2007 (CST)

• VIDEO someone with animation skills should have made a computer transforming into a ROBOT!!!! - surely ◄ € Zenophile ﮚ ► ◄ Ǽ Talk ▪ ĹŭĿž ► 16:29, 4 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Advent Calendar

Open a door on the advent calendar every day until Dec 25th in celebration of the birth of Christ Jesus --Luna 17:56, 1 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Vandals

User:OCdratsab and user:Gamerx07 are vandalizing. Gamerx07 keeps blanking nigga and OCdratsab keeps posting some crappy youtube everywhere. And the IRC wont' work. --   Sir-kitty    talk    contribs  12:58, 2 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Laz D

There MUST be an article for this guy. He's a retarded rapper, I shit u knot. He should be called "Lulz-D". Google him for more info.--Shitbitch 18:43, 2 December 2007 (CST)

Oh, that was beautiful. Seconded . . .

On JewTube

Thundercunt 01:24, 7 December 2007 (CST)

I've started article already: Laz-D--Shitbitch 19:14, 8 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] BAAAAAAAAAAWWWW

Mutual butthurt-fest between Chaos wraith x, which is full of anti-lulz, and Son of art, who wrote it and has been skulking around. Some vandals have been banned already. Is there anything that can be salvaged from this article? Should it be included in the Retarded Wiccan Drama series? Could someone keep an eye out for Artisson sockpuppets? And why do all pagans write like schizophrenics? Halp. Dianoga 19:14, 2 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] ED Game

I have decided to end abandon my RPGXP project in favor of creating one with Adventure Game Studio. I'll be including a few of the plot elements from the RPGXP game, but for all intents and purposes this is a completely new project. An adventure game, made in the style of some of the olde sierra classic. Well, somewhat. It will have a combination graphical and text-based interface. Meaning there will be some tasks you can perform by point and click, including character movement, looking at objects, and talking to people, but for other things, you will have to use the text parser. The reason for this is because it makes it easier to add lulz and special easter eggs. "An hero" will be a legitimate command... just think of the possibilities. Anyway, anyone is free to take over the old RPGXP project if they so desire, so long as I am credited in some way. I'll create a project page later on, but figured I'd let ya'll know what's up. I will likely be needing some help with images and sprites, but I'm planning on doing the scripting myself. Just holler at me if you've any questions. --Blu Aardvark 22:48, 2 December 2007 (CST)

• Project page. --Blu Aardvark 04:18, 3 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] 2007

Hey EDiots, what's your favorite occurance of 2007? Lemme know lol. --Sheneequa • Talk 17:48, 3 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Durova pwned

Register article about Wikipedia drama. Basically Durova tried to do what Jimbo Wales did to Miltopia, except this guy had shitloads of friends and they all called bullshit on it. In the process, SlimVirgin's super secret cyber-stalking mailing list got its cover blown. Loads of drama and embarrassment all around. Lateral 03:09, 4 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Help

Is there a way to start an article and save it without it being seen until it is finished? I want to start one, but I can't finish it in one day. Thanx!—The preceding comment was added by BabyGurl, who is too much of a faggot to sign his or her own posts. IT'S 4 TILDES (~), NOT ROCKET SCIENCE!

• yes create it in your userspace. User:BabyGurl/MyArticle - i would read ED:101 first if i was you. ◄ € Zenophile ﮚ ► ◄ Ǽ Talk ▪ ĹŭĿž ► 15:14, 4 December 2007 (CST)

• WE SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE. And here, too. ED is not the place for you to work out your stupid, petty little grudges against some wonky-eyed bitch who gets more cock than you. Stop putting those lame pictures everywhere, stop adding her to everything, and don't you even think about trying to publish that bullshit article. It's not funny and I hope very much that you get banned. Dianoga 13:20, 5 December 2007 (CST)

• erm yeah - your article is not really what ED is about ◄ € Zenophile ﮚ ► ◄ Ǽ Talk ▪ ĹŭĿž ► 14:18, 5 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] AN hero

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22116784/?GT1=10645 an hero LOLOLOLOL Ephebo66

by the way have you seen the new windows?

• PLASTIC-RIMMED EMO GLASSES make you kill people. SixhundredSixtySix 20:55, 5 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] On the topic of gay Republitards who insist they are straight

It might be interesting for someone to write on the "Ex-Gay" movement, the various X-tian groups that try to convince the less-intelligent gay folks that it's a "choice" and that they can be "cured." I think there's some online "communities" and message boards etc. that could be fun to troll. I've seen the leaders of these groups on TV and without exception they are raging queens. Also, there are groups like "Americans for Truth about the Homosexual Agenda." This is like a kinder, gentler sort of Fred Phelps. The guy hates faggotry so much that he goes on Hannity & Colmes to "expose" the gay debauchery of San Francisco's Folsom Street Fair by showing video clips of public blow-jobs and buttsecks.

• I believe you are also referring to the I-35 movement. - Jasper _Jasper @ _MeowMail.com 17:14, 8 December 2007 (CST)

Anyway, there is drama and humor in all this! --| »⇔«¿ 10:21, 6 December 2007 (CST)

• Ha ha holy shit that Americans for Truth site even has a search function that lets Larry Craig and Bob Allen find all the "cruisy toilets"! There apparently are only a few in the USA, but check out Florida!

--| »⇔«¿ 10:28, 6 December 2007 (CST)

• i like the last supper fag-flyer

Man leads bare-breasted female slave “partner” around by a dog collar. It appears that in recent years, heterosexual perverts have joined their “gay” brethren at the “fair” in increasing numbers. Talk about a setback for women’s rights …

◄ € Zenophile ﮚ ► ◄ Ǽ Talk ▪ ĹŭĿž ► 23:14, 6 December 2007 (CST)

• And yet there's this. Dianoga 01:57, 7 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Santa's a Pedobot

Microsoft Embarrassed After Computerized Santa Brings Up Oral Sex With Young Girl --OldDirtyBtard 15:33, 6 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Where child rape and bestiality merge

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4KjDuQAMr0 --Ritegroic 07:26, 7 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Censorship

Digg it --Sheneequa • Talk 18:06, 7 December 2007 (CST)

• This kind of stuff has been going on for a while. Last time I checked (early Nov.?), Dave Eggers again did not appear on google at all except if dramatica was added as a search term. For yahoo, the article had been totally disappeared, the only hits for <name> + <Dramatica> were Important people and Category:People. I checked a few other articles the last coupla times, some Wikipedia-related ones were in the same boat (sry, didn't take notes). Muhpinion is that lobbying from wikipedoes (or wikipedoes that work there, partic. 4 google) is teh main factor that makes teh search engines think this shit is OK. Agent of teh Cabal 10:34, 8 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Neuticles etc

After the cat washing machine...

Potential. However I'm to drunk and emotional (aka wasretd) right now to even link it. Have at it /b/.

THE CAT LITTERBOT.

--OldDirtyBtard 04:37, 8 December 2007 (CST)

• Those aren't the cutest cats on that main page. They really should have tried for some cuter cats. Ritegroic

• Does anyone have that video "cat washing machine..." on a site that actually lets you download the whole thing? I tried many downloaders including one that forces resume and nothing can get the entire thing google video in tact as google just times out. It used to be on YouTube but YouTube removed it. Ritegroic 09:45, 8 December 2007 (CST)

• PROTIP: http://www.downloadhelper.net/welcome.php?version=2.5.3

--OldDirtyBtard 21:42, 8 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] A new source of shock pics

http://www.usdoj.gov/methawareness/#affectuser Scroll down to the pictures of teeth. Ritegroic 04:53, 8 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] You have got to be shitting me.

This girl is begging to become an-hero. Anon, please troll right away.

Here's the source.

In case you were wanting an overview, it's a 15 year old girl who believes herself to be a queen vampire and dropped out of school.

[2] Lured into Darkness —The preceding comment was added by ScaryTownTerminator, who is too much of a faggot to sign his or her own posts. IT'S 4 TILDES (~), NOT ROCKET SCIENCE!

• Yawn. --Aghar     15:48, 8 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Party On, Hokies

Penn State supports you. --Aghar     15:48, 8 December 2007 (CST)

--Blu Aardvark 00:00, 11 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Don't Mess With Football Christmas Shoping!

OP's threat.

Aussie Anon got v& after posting on /b/ that he was going to shoot up The Grove mall in LA. 4chan coughed up his IP and the Party Van was dispatched.

Video link.

I have to split for a few hours so DO IT FAGGOT! started. --OldDirtyBtard 18:02, 9 December 2007 (CST)

--OldDirtyBtard 16:44, 8 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Ualuealuealeuale/Macarron Chacarron

This annoying song/video should have it's own artice, no matter how stupid it is. Sounds like Special Ed singing, or a failed attemp at singing Chocolate Rain. You might know this as "Batman" or something.--Shitbitch 18:39, 8 December 2007 (CST)

• No Runawaydevil 14:05, 9 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Insurrection019

flush this faggot tree and raep user / A.B. 10:25, 9 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] KEKEKEKEKEKE

Sup bitches   janus zeal    desu    contribs  

• Yo foo! Welcome home. Get back in the fucking trenches nigger.

--OldDirtyBtard 23:14, 9 December 2007 (CST)

• • <3 yes sir   janus zeal    desu    contribs  

[edit] Attention K-Mart Shoopers

Calling on shoopers with 1337 skeelz to provide a shoop of Chris Forcand missing a gored foot -a la Pedobear- for the Internet Vigilante Group article.

Kthx...--OldDirtyBtard 23:13, 9 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] SFB

Jimmy Wales to exit TOW

EPIC WIN!

--OldDirtyBtard 20:49, 10 December 2007 (CST)

• lol rly? --Blu Aardvark 20:55, 10 December 2007 (CST)

lol awesome. Someone read it all the way through and make a summary, plz? --Knickerbockers

• Actually, it seems the conclusion isn't wholly accurate. Jimbo said, and I quote, "never gonna give you up". --Blu Aardvark 15:43, 11 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] BREAKING NEWS-CHURCH SHOOTING SPREE

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071211/ap_on_re_us/church_shootings

At the church where Ted Haggard used to preach...

It's not clear yet whether gunman was pwned or became an hero. —The preceding comment was added by Ididit, who is too much of a faggot to sign his or her own posts. IT'S 4 TILDES (~), NOT ROCKET SCIENCE!

• I just hope he was listening to Slayer on his ride between sprees. Militant Atheism is worthless without a proper soundtrack. §a¡n† S¡†hney 03:45, 11 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] KOSHA BOY!111!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=9oYDBtCN-hk

Maybe a featured video? --Knickerbockers 17:25, 10 December (EST)

[edit] JewTubes Policy

It should be practice that whenever someone is authoring an article on a jewtube or livevideo user, they should download their videos. We are losing lulz because the targets of said articles baleet their videos upon discovery of their articles. switchiedagger is an example of this. --dcslater 15:26, 11 December 2007 (CST)

http://rapidshare.com/files/75886723/Re__Lori_Drew_s_Blog.flv.html

• ALWAYS BACK UP _ STANDARD PRACTICE ◄ € Zenophile ﮚ ► ◄ Ǽ Talk ▪ ĹŭĿž ► 15:30, 11 December 2007 (CST)
  • But also:

1. Deleted Youtube retriever
2. Another one

--| »⇔«¿ 21:56, 11 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Black boxes with text and a caption on 4chan - is there a name for this?

You know how on 4chan a picture is used on a black background and then there's a title of text in white, with some other smaller text below (like this, but there are over 9000 other examples). Call me a newfag, but does this have a name? And also how do I make my own? What font do I use?--ByAppointmentTo 16:01, 11 December 2007 (CST)

• Demotivators. Read the article, check the external links for a few tools to make 'em. --Blu Aardvark 16:03, 11 December 2007 (CST)
  • PROTIP http://diy.despair.com/motivator.php

--OldDirtyBtard 22:12, 11 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] fucking lonelypages

Eliminate lonelypages guys... this is the easiest! Special:Lonelypages. Yr armchair sysop, Quasidan 16:16, 11 December 2007 (CST)

• Lol orphans are the shittiest. But yeah we get it taken care of every once inawhile. --Sheneequa • Talk 16:29, 11 December 2007 (CST)
  • Lol, done. -=- Phobos alalalala

[edit] Retarded Edit Wars

I've taken the liberty of adding all article pages with the {{warzone}} template to the Series on Retarded Edit Wars, in the hope that the existence of this series will encourage sensible EDiots to go forth and pick out the choicest bits of lulz. Feel free to revert if it proves to be unnecessary, though. Push Butan 18:30, 11 December 2007 (CST)

• Or maybe it'll shame the edit-war participants into shutting the hell up... wouldn't that be nice? Dianoga 18:47, 11 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] DRAMA ALERT: BREAKING IRL NEWS

A monkey...on the lamb.

6 kids shot in Vegas by two gunmen who are currently on the lam. They say it stemmed from a school fight.

--OldDirtyBtard 18:50, 11 December 2007 (CST)

on the lam? ◄ € Zenophile ﮚ ► ◄ Ǽ Talk ▪ ĹŭĿž ► 19:35, 11 December 2007 (CST)

• "Lam" = high on Quaaludes (Old French). --| »⇔«¿ 21:59, 11 December 2007 (CST)

(just kidding, it means on the run.)

• I was tempted to put lamb -as in Colbert's "monkey on the lam" series.

[edit] How the hell do you have sex with a bicycle?

This man rapes bikes

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/10/26/nsex126.xml http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/society/bryonygordon/october07/bicyclesex.htm http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/7095134.stm http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/7098116.stm

I don't know how that works, but there's some real life rule 34 on bikes if anyone wanted it or wants to approach him. I wonder if the bike was new? Loli bike rape. Cubist

• If the seat breaks off, dude. Jeez you are such a n00b as evidenced by you not signing your post. You have sex with a bicycle if the seat breaks off....I learned this the hard way. Ritegroic 01:24, 12 December 2007 (CST)
  • Argh, forgot the tildes again. I'll defer to your great experience with having bicycle sex then. I am only a n00b at these things after all. Maybe you could give me some tips. Did you start on roller skates and work my way up? This is a fetish I've never heard of. Cubist 01:53, 12 December 2007 (CST)

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/7095134.stm

Mr Stewart was caught in the act with his bicycle by cleaners in his bedroom at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr. 

Gail Davidson, prosecuting, told Ayr Sheriff Court: "They knocked on the door several times and there was no reply. 

"They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the accused wearing only a white t-shirt, naked from the waist down. 

"The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex." 

Look at that, the maid broke into his hotel room, then broke into his bedroom. The guy was doing this completely in private and secret and they treat him like he was doing it in public. Would they have arrested him if he was whacking off or had a woman with him?

• That part was pretty weird to me too, but then at least we got to hear about it this way. This is A or B+ grade material as far as bizarre fetishes go. I think he's like a local hero now they are championing his rights to bike sex. Cubist 02:07, 12 December 2007 (CST)

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/7098116.stm

He was reported by cleaners at a hostel who unlocked his door and found him engaged in a sex act with his bike. 

Stewart was put on the Sex Offenders' Register, which some posters said was an over-reaction by the sheriff. 

One contributor asked: "Would they have done the same to a woman with a sex toy? 

"Apart from the fact that the sex toy was manufactured for the purpose, and a bicycle wasn't, I really don't see that the two acts are all that different." 

"This case should not prevent people who want to engage in this sort of activity doing so", John Scott, Human rights expert

Another blogger said: "I am more disturbed by the sheriff's ruling than the act of having sex with a bike." 

Those discussing the case online were also worried about the future implications. 

One person wrote: "It's bad news for privacy in the UK because of how a ruling like this could be used to support similar cases in future." 

Legal experts said he would have been placed on the Sex Offenders' Register under Section 80 of the Sexual Offences Act 2003. 

-In 1997 Robert Watt, 38, was fined £100 for trying to have sex with a shoe in an Edinburgh street
-In 2002 the same man was arrested for simulating sex with a traffic cone in front of a crowd of people
-Earlier this month, sentence was deferred on teenager Steven Marshall, from Galashiels, who admitted simulating sex on a pavement while drunk.

Human rights lawyer John Scott told the BBC Scotland news website that the case raised important privacy issues. 

He said: "It certainly prompts questions about what people can and can't do behind closed doors with inanimate objects. 

I've done worse shit than that (sometimes with a partner) and I'm glad nobody broke into my house and put my on the sex offender list. Ritegroic 01:32, 12 December 2007 (CST)

• What did you have sex with then? An underage skateboard? Did a humvee give you a hummer knife point? Inquiring minds would like to know Cubist 01:53, 12 December 2007 (CST)

The bizarre fetishes that the police have come across that they mentioned are also good. Sex with shoes, pavements and bicycles are pretty lulzworthy. Cubist 01:58, 12 December 2007 (CST)

• It's a homeless hostel... Chances are good that any sexual activity were against the rules for him anyway, and his behavior could have been classified as attention seeking deviant sexual activity/ exhibitionism, since he didn't warn the hostel's cleaners and didn't stop once the broke in, and warranting his placement on the sex offender list.--Aghar     08:11, 12 December 2007 (CST)

Bicycles... oh murr!-Ket^{the KangaJew}_{Sodomy plz} 08:34, 12 December 2007 (CST)

• It's called "frottage." --| »⇔«¿ 08:44, 12 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Megan Had it Coming

Supposedly, 106,000 google hits as of today, though ED didn't appear until #102. --| »⇔«¿ 10:13, 12 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] IRC

I can be a more effective contributor if I am able to lurk irc. Could someone with the power do so on IRC please dsicuss my misdeeds in order to remedy the problem? --dcslater 15:08, 12 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] 711Chan Plans To Raid us

HereThey plan to "Raid" us in retaliation to Newfaggotry(note that I see this as funny and not serious in any way) Fou-Lu 17:48, 12 December 2007 (CST)

• There's always some fucking faggot, on some imageboard, in some part of the internet complaining about 'ED encouraging n00bs' to take part in something and generally fagging it up-Ket^{the KangaJew}_{Sodomy plz} 20:11, 12 December 2007 (CST)
  • I know, but just so we know when to expect some vandalism on the meme pages --Fou-Lu 21:18, 12 December 2007 (CST)

I have their list of demands. Fall on your sword Blu or we will have to kill you.

--OldDirtyBtard 21:41, 12 December 2007 (CST)

• I wonder what, in particular, they are in objection to? My redesign of the main page? My AGS-game-in-progress? My sexually trained dogs? I really need to know what I am expected to become an hero over. --Blu Aardvark 22:06, 12 December 2007 (CST)

• Why don't you install FlaggedRevs? That would dampen page overwriting ("vandalism"). --Htr 22:06, 12 December 2007 (CST)

• 

  haha thread over
  --| »⇔«¿ 22:57, 12 December 2007 (CST)
• Stupid kids. "And if a page is edited enough, the 'Change Back' button will prove useless." "And, say we did it twice over for every page, how far back does their button revert?" Hahaha. Someone doesn't have a fucking clue about Wikis, besides you can always restore from the database anyways, you can remove revisions in that way too. This guy has the right idea though: "Foolishness, the only way to really kill ED is to kill the people who run it IRL." Internet Serious Fucking Business. Lateral 23:06, 12 December 2007 (CST)

[edit] Templates not displaying

Anyone else having trouble viewing the "warning" and "fact" templates? This may just be an Opera issue, but I'm not sure. Dianoga 21:58, 12 December 2007 (CST)

• IIRC they were blanked by a sysop because people were fagging up articles with them. 'Tis a pity, really, cause those templates worked well when used properly-Ket^{the KangaJew}_{Sodomy plz} 22:02, 12 December 2007 (CST)
  • Ket recalls correctly. --Blu Aardvark 22:04, 12 December 2007 (CST)
    • Jew Aardvark must die for grape juxtix. Plox to be dei naow. --OldDirtyBtard 22:08, 12 December 2007 (CST)
      • I did not know this :(--Quit _{or I'll use these} ^{your whining} 22:05, 12 December 2007 (CST)