Microsoft Windows
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Insecure, chafing, bug-ridden filth. <- This is usually what Lunix Faggots have to say about Microsoft Windows, which is ironic because it describes them perfectly as well. They say this because they are filthy communists who hate America. Windows provides everybody, from the basic user to the enterprise management teams all the tools they need to argue about who would win in a fight between Superman and Batman, provided they don't have hang-ups about their computer crashing every five seconds, randomly deleting their files, and catching fire (See: ReiserFS). The usability of Windows 3.1 ushered in the reign of our Illuminati masters as we know it today. The retarded killer application turned out to be Solitaire, since this was simple enough to run without crashing, as long as nothing else was running at the same time.
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[edit] Windows Statistics
- Is crap
- Has 10^8 fanboys.
- Old versions like Windows 95, 98, and ME crash at least 100 times a SECOND
- Windows bashers actually use Windows more than any other OS because they can't figure out how to play World of Warcraft with WINE.
[edit] The Anti-Windows Movement
Linux users and other retards think Windows is the shittiest operating system ever. Little do they realize that making fun of Windows ME's constant crashing became a worn out joke a long time ago. The up-to-date joke being the fact that Windows catches more strains of viruses than a nymphomaniac prostitute and only then begins to act like Windows ME and back (although saying that Windows crashes all is a great way to troll Windowsfags). The fact is, Windows XP is a piece of shit just like Linux. Fags actually sit around waiting for someone to tell them all this so they can argue about it for hours and hours.
Compared to Windows, Mac OS X is AIDS. It spreads lulz.
Some people have hypothesized Windows is an illegal monopoly, but M$ has proven time and time again that it isnt, namely by bundling their own web browser, multimedia program and more recently an exceptional security system along with their OS.
[edit] Windows TNG
BREAKING NEWS! Vista, otherwise known as Windows Vista, otherwise known as Satan's toolbox, is coming out soon. Jewfag Bill Gates made this infernal bit of crap as an attempt to make more money by luring Apple Fanboys into his basement. He plans to sell this horrible, cancer-inducing shister-tech with the PC version of Halo 2, using the promise of a crappy flamethrower and the ability to drive a dildo in laggy online multiplayer to lure millions of stupid fanboys to the system, saying it's the best game ever.
Vista is to be forever in beta stages, making Halo Vista even more laggy than on XP.
PROOF Vista is not copying any other OS!!!
[edit] How to prepare for inevitable armageddon that is Vista
Empty your wallet in a vain attempt to upgrade your video card so that Vista will actually run. Open your mouth and insert Microsoft's collective corporate flaccid penis. Be astounded at the amazing features that have been included in Mac OS X for years.
Congratulations! Your soul now belongs to Bill Gates! Enjoy your last years in bloated, bug-ridden purgatory before Satan returns to Earth to claim your immortal spirit and force your to play Solitaire on a Compaq Presario running Windows 95 for all eternity.
[edit] VISTA FAQ
Q:What does VISTA stand for?
A:Vainglorious & Incompatible Software with Tenacious Assburgers
Q:How do I uninstall VISTA and replace with 95/98/XP/LINUX?
A:Because VISTA was modeled after AIDS, there is no cure.
Q:Why is my VISTA folder over 10 gigabytes?
A:LOL
Q: I bought a PC package with preinstalled Vista. I want to Install XP on that pc. Where is the Vista Installation DVD and Where can I find winXP drivers for the hardware?
A: Ha ha ha...
Q:Why is there so much fail with VISTA?
A:To accompany the vast amounts of AIDS.
Q:Why don't any games/applications work with VISTA?
A:To fix compatibility issues, visit the Microsoft Technical Support Page.
Q:When i try to deleta a file, Vista says "You don't have rights to delete this file". But i am the owner of the file. Why cant i delete it?
A:Since everything you have on your computer with Vista belongs to Microsoft you simply just don't have right do delete your own files. Read the EULA before you accept it.
[edit] See Also
- H-Dub Beeper SOFTWARE SO ADVANCED IT WILL BLOW YOUR MIND
- .wmv
- Buffering
- Mac