Reason

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

If you, your mom or your dawgs want to make some fly beats, some heavy beats, even a couple of fat beats, then Reason is the ridiculously overpriced program you seek.

Reason was created, like most good things, by gay Finns under the banner of Propellerhead Software. They utilized cutting edge MIDI technology to create a program capable of producing myriads of styles of music, anything from jungle to breakbeat, ambient to synthpop.

It is an amazing tool and has become as much an industry standard as ProTools. Unfortunately, 99.999% of Reason users prefer to make music that sounds like retarded children smacking their heads against an electronic drum kit while Scarface plays in the background.

[edit] Reason Musicians

They are never actually musicians, because real musicians know better than to solely use Reason (or any other program by itself). Instead, these are primarily scenesters who asked their geek friends to have them pirate a copy of it, due to some flash of aspie-like inspiration.

Thankfully, these "musicians" soon realize it takes more than listening to The Cure for 80 hours straight to be an artist, and eventually give up on the program.

Before they do that though, they figure out how to post their shit music onto some dark, dank music forum that allows that kind of thing.