Jameth
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| Warning! |  | This contributor is a chronic masturbator. You can help by contradicting everything. Please remove this notice after revisions. |
|---|
Jameth, also known as Faggeth, is a big LiveJournal homosexual. He is a member of the original LJDrama circlejerk, where his Internet notoriety originates. He commands the drama yacht.
Note: this is an article about an Encyclopedia Dramatica user. For more information, please see the appropriate user page. To leave this user a message, please visit User_Talk:Jameth.
Contents |
[edit] History and Pronunciaction
The nickname originated sometime in early 2001 when James (his real name, the -th suffix being a pun on his faggotry) was having a conversation with a lisping homosexual. James was being referred to as Jameth because of the person's speech impediment. In June 2001, James decided to use Jameth as his LiveJournal account name.
A debate has existed in real life and on the Internets regarding the correct pronunciation of Jameth. The original pronunciation was one syllable.
- Exercise: Try holding your tongue and saying "James" to hear exactly how it was first pronounced.
The pronunciation of the word has morphed throughout the years into the two syllable (and most commonly used) form Jay-meth. Both forms are acceptable; however, you will probably be laughed out of any social situation if you do not pronounce it with two syllables.
[edit] The Four Five Six Stages of Jameth
His LiveJournal has gone through six main stages that can be loosely classified as:
[edit] The Homo Normative (late 2001 - mid 2002)
- Jameth has relationship problems, Jameth goes to school, Jameth has breakfast, Jameth plays with his cats, Jameth has friends.
- Total LiveJournal friends: 20
- Sample posts from this period:
- I have nothing to report. Except for.. it might snow tomorrow morning!@#! YAY! The ONE day I have to wake up and be downtown by 7:30! and i'm not tired either.. sigh
- i purchased a pumpkin but now i'm not sure what to do with it.
- I haven't had an erection ever since i was food poisoned on saturday night. i have lost all desire for booty.
[edit] The Absent (mid 2002 - mid 2003)
- Often hailed by longtime Jameth supporters and fans as his best period, this is when Jameth posts once a month and goes through a personal crisis when his ex-boyfriend stalks him and he takes only seventy-seven pictures a day. Jameth considers converting to Buddhism but realizes that there really aren't that many abusive Buddhist fags.
- Jameth's LiveJournal friends list increases significantly (~300 'Friend-of') due to his enrollment at the University of Washington, alma mater of Brad Fitzpatrick (creator of LiveJournal).
- Sample posts from this period:
- dictionary.com is down. i am very upset. i'm going to eat lunch and head back to the library to do some reading or something.
- i have a midterm tomorrow and i still have over a hundred pages to read.
- i think i'm going to take a shower and then head to campus... i have class until 9pm tonight. ugh.
[edit] The Internet Celebrity (mid 2003 - late 2004)
- While Jameth enjoyed Internet fame before, this period represents his greatest achievements in terms of attention-whoring and blogging infamy. He began with a faked death and soon moved on to leeching image files, often perverted in nature.
- The early Internet Celebrity period is marked by a profusion of LiveJournal phone posts, where henchmen (and some of his enemies) would compete in leaving the most abusive transcriptions on his journal. Jameth would masturbate to them and later post pictures of him ingesting his own semen in various creative ways.
- After LiveJournal Abuse, that bunch of Nazis and hypocritical fucksticks shitstained a whole lot of fine journals into oblivion, Jameth started comment whoring and would average three hundred and seventeen comments per journal entry. He soon reached the 60,000 mark and started threatening suicide. When nobody cared (except for Quasidan), he condemned the world Jewry as being conspirators in a grand plan to overthrow the fags rule in Seattle and began taking pictures of his cats.
- Friends list explosion occurs in early 2004 due to association with LJ Drama and major events related to that site (see Mediacrat) as well as various run-ins with the LiveJournal Abuse Team. Jameth's 'Friend-of' count on LiveJournal is pushed over 500.
- Sample posts from this period:
- Ugh, the internet sucks tonight. i'm going to bed.
- lol what
- 28th post for today. i think that's a record! i'm going to bed. goodnight, internets!
[edit] The Defunct (late 2004 - early 2005)
- After numerous encounters with the LiveJournal Abuse Team and incessant bitching about the DMCA, Jameth decides that it's time to pack his bags and leave LiveJournal for good. He sets up camp over at Lulz News Network.
- Jameth continues to loiter and post random memes in his journal and also makes rare community posts that always exceed 50 comments.
- 'Friend-of' count hovers somewhere around 700 in early December 2004. The LiveJournal syndication feed of Lulz News Network reaches 300+ subscribers within a few days. Lulz News Network receives 30,000 hits within the first ten days of operation.
- Sample posts from this period:
- I am almost completely fed up with this bullshit.
- I should ebay the password to my LJ. How much would you pay for it?
- My cat just puked.
[edit] The Emo Camwhore (February 2005 - April 2006)
February 21, 2005 was a dark day indeed for these Internets. Like the plot to a bad Corey Feldman movie, Jameth somehow acquired an evil pair of black squarish emo glasses and immediately began posting an extended series of Internet disease photos. He also immediately lost the ability to LJ cut, although he naturally retained the power to upload new userpics. He also caused a great deal of incidental damage (read: chafing in personal areas) to dedicated stalkers and groupies worldwide.
And on that happy note, I'm off for a sitz bath.
Only time will tell what lulz this newest, latest, OMG GRND FLR Jameth will bring.
[edit] The IRL Celebrity (Last Thursday - )
Being featured in the New York Times, Jameth's fame has officially expanded beyond the Internets. Hookers and blow are expected to follow. This period has also seen the best drama since the days of Mediacrat.
It should be noted that no-one outside of a few LiveJournal communities knows who Jameth is or even cares that he has two cats. While moar people know the names of internet personalities Jimbo Wales and CmdrTaco, Jameth carves out his niche by brushing his teeth and not molesting children.
[edit] Personal
Jameth has one cat, Poko Ono (a previous cat, Porsche, died in November 2005 aged 19). Poko is cute, but one fears that if animals have souls, Poko Ono may be doomed to Hell for association with such a stridently raucious gay.
IMPORTANT CAT-RELATED UPDATE: Jameth has recently obtained an additional black cat, securing his fame as owner of Two Cats.
It is rumoard that Jameth has leprosy, but the rumors are unclear and originate from Jameth's nemesis Futhman.
Jameth also has a sister on LJ with an Ann Coulter complex, Jaqueline1776. It is unknown if their parents are aware of their childrens' internet infamy, or where they went wrong.
Jameth parades his homosexuality as if it were a banner of pride, but within that pride lies the shame of disease and cockmongering. Jameth is an attention whore of the worst possible kind: just as his flea-blown, wart-infested anus gapes like that of the goatse man when he is begging for sodomy from strangers with pool cues, so do his multiple journals scream LOOK AT ME in the time-honored shameless tradition of Livejournal.
[edit] Friends
Jameth is surrounded at all times by a changing rotation of henchmen, well-wishers, online stalkers and, occasionally, a Libertarian sister wooing the Livejournal homosexual ballot. Whereas Jameth is sometimes intelligent or at least admits to his bathetic need for gobs of semen, penile (or rather, phallic) insertions and male affection, his henchmen are usually deluded freaks whose motivations range from jumping on the latest internet trends to merely seeking anonymous faggot-sex.
[edit] Troll
Reportedly Jameth does not have time to troll, what with taking care of his gazillion cats, and juggling his hectic gay lifestyle - but rumor has it that he is also known as Jason916[1]
[edit] Other
- His PR manager is Scarlet. Please direct all fan mail, eel girl transcription requests, lollercaust reports and other misc. drama to her.
- Jameth is currently linked to hep on the internet sexchart due to the infamous LJDrama kiss.
- Likes to mail shit via UPS.
- Lulz News Network
- Married
- Jameth Effect
- Allegations that Frienditto ate Jameth's baby circulate the internets; only believed by idiots.
- ROFL.
| Jameth is part of the iDrama Suite | Encyclopedia Dramatica • LJDrama • Frienditto • Ghettoditto • Narcopolo • AudioLJ • Anonymuncule
Related People |
|---|
