Nine Inch Nails
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Nine Inch Nails is the result of rampant steroid abuse and serious emo faggotry. Trent Reznor, the band's frontman, is well known for bawling about the kind of stupid shit that only he and his target audience care about, like getting raped by your uncle Frank or when your mom won't buy you a shirt from Hot Topic.
Needless to say, legions of 13 year old boys and 16 year old girls have come to love Trent's music, feeling that they can connect to his lyrics on a deeply personal level.Contents |
[edit] A Brief History Of NIN
Michael Trent Reznor (b. May 17, 1965) grew up in the small town of Bumfuck Nowhere, Pennsylvania. He started playing the piano (lol, faggot) at the age of five and was considered to be a prodigious emo bitch even at that young age. On his grandparents' farm, he was given the responsibility of being in charge of animal reproduction. He would often spend hours on his knees, manually masturbating horses, bulls, and dogs for fertilization and reproduction (although the dogs he did just for fun).
At age ten, he and some of the other outcasts from his school got together and decided to start playing cheap ripoffs of Skinny Puppy and Ministry songs. They were a hit at the school talent shows they played at, but all still got their lunch money stolen after the gigs (it is rumored that the band's drummer even got an atomic wedgie, though these allegations were never verified. To this day, when asked about the alleged incident, the drummer has been known to break down in tears, yelling that he "doesn't want to talk about it").
Trent soon discovered that he could make his live performances much more exciting by:
- Covering himself in corn starch
- Breaking his expensive equipment
- Playing video on a screen behind the stage so the audience doesn't have to watch the mopey motherfuckers performing
- Doing piles of cocaine before shows, Scarface-style
He can't do anything right
80s music is srs bsns
[edit] Observe the phail
 Ooohh...edgy |
 lol idk internetz? |
 These boxes. They iz srs. |
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 That molotov cocktail is meant for the NIN poster, not the cops |
 Reznor joined forces with Tom Felp to create newgrounds.com, futher proving that he is a leet haxxorz, d00d!1!1 |
 SO non-conformist |
 Backstage at a Nine Inch Nails concert |
[edit] See also
[edit] External links
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Nine Inch Nails is part of a series on Music. |
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