Abortion
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
A sure fire subject to send any politically minded community into a 400 comment flame war, abortion is the gut bustingly hilarious procedure in which a soon-to-be ugly baby is instead destroyed before it has a chance to wreak havoc on the world.
There are two schools of thought regarding abortion: pro-life (aka anti-woman by feminists) and pro-choice (aka anti-human). Both of them are characterized by producing extreme portions of drama and nearly no logical points whatsoever. However, everyone knows that neither of these two parties are correct, and that the only sensible stance is for killing babies and not letting women have the right to choose.
There are many pro-life communities on LiveJournal (the biggest one being prolife), just as there are many pro-choice communities. The two hate each other, and if any member of one community crosses paths with a member of the opposing community, you know some flames will go down.
Abortion is the best way to make sure your kid doesn't grow up to degrade women by looking at pornography.
Romanians get the olympic-gold-fucking medal for abortions: they killz 3 quarters of their unborn kidz.
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[edit] Abortion Analogy
The best way to look at abortion is in terms of Halo 2 on Xbox Live. One female slut accidentally starts searching for a match and finds one. However, before the match starts, she can simply hit the B button, and go back to the pregame lobby. From this point she can find new people to make her controller vibrate, until she is sure she wants to play and live with the consequences. Abortion really just is a B button.
[edit] Pro-Life
Someone who is pro-life is someone who is against abortion cause it be murder, most people who call themself prolife tend to be republican, libertarian, (despite how thier glorious Ayn Rand wasn't) or populist.
Besides that, they are made of liquid awesome and know how to give great oral to avoid making babies so nobody has to die. They are all super awesome and you should become one immideatly. Though, be careful of their laser eyes! They can spot an unborn baby for miles, and if that baby is anywhere near an abortion clinic, then... well, ask these guys.
Ironically, people who are pro-life are in favor of the death penalty and killing people in Iraq (and pretty much anywhere else President Bush feels like having people killed; what, do you hate America?).
The mortal enemy of any pro-lifer is someone who is pro-choice.
[edit] Pro-Choice
Someone who is pro-choice is generally considered to be the embodiment of all things awesome (strictly due to their love of killing babies, which is AWWWWRIIIGHT.) However, recently the pro-choice movement has been filled with feminists, thus making its ghey levels Over 9000. Though, unlike pro-life, they actually believe the mother is a person.
There are many theories behind the origins of the feminist anti-lulz, but no clear cut answer is available. However, here are the 3 most likely sources:
(Please take to note that these, along with the gays, furries, and Jesus, are among those suspected for the 9/11 attacks.)
Pro-choicers will not rest until every innocent fetus has been sucked from every un-consenting womb, but are fighting to save the bad guys in iraq and take the child-rapists and serial killers off of death row. As Osama Bin Laden is more human than a un-born baby.
NOTE: Pro-choice shall forever remain unlulzy until every feminist on the planet is executed.
[edit] Middle Ground
There is no middle ground. You are either a baby-killer or a sexist. Kevin and Kat are, together, the biggest baby-killers evar. A possible third position is to be in favor of abortion as long as the mother is not white.
[edit] Opinion
| “ | If I was a girl, I would get pregnant as many times as possible, then have abortions after the third month of being pregnant so I would deliver a potato sized 1/3 developed dead fetus, then I would take the fetus, put it in a jar of preservative liquid and put it on a shelf in a secret room in my house. and i would do it until I had so many rooms walls were nothing but potato sized aborted fetuses. then i would have a kid and when they're bad i would make them sit in the fetus room and remind them of how easy i could have aborted their ass. | „ |
[edit] Abortion drama
- There is an Abortion category on LJDrama, dedicated to child-free and abortion drama.
- Recently some prick managed to amass 1200+ comments and 89,000+ views in one day, by mistaking The Onion for a purveyor of real news. The article in question, I'm Totally Psyched About This Abortion!, netted a few enthusiastic replies by this gentleman who believed it to be real, and not obvious satire. Notably, he doesn't know what an Ellipsis is, nor what it signifies... it is assumed that he doesn't speak Japanese...
- On Myspace, the biggest prolife group found was found here: Pro-Life. As ironic as the URL sounds, it is a prolife group. It should also be noted that the group site currently has no mod, so it is free for flaming.
[edit] Training Video Demonstrating an Abortion
 Prolifers support ear-neck boy! |
 Monkey-Girl supports pro-lifers! |
 Thanks for not aborting me! |
 Awww, isn't it just precious? |
 An aborted mexican baby |
 A baby not aborted. victory for pro-lifers everywhere! |
 Intelligent design in action |
 How cute! |
 Their way of converting people to the prolife way. |
[edit] See also
- Nathan Sheets, who provided the photo.
- Puckish - bitch who cares more about flaming than abortion
- Kevin and Kat
- Bible Resources Recommend ED's Abortion Stance
