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Anonymous Borg

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Your technological and biological retardedness shall be added to our own.  Resistance is futile.
Your technological and biological retardedness shall be added to our own. Resistance is futile.
Anonymous Borg Locutus of Lulz prepares to issue a fatwa.
Anonymous Borg Locutus of Lulz prepares to issue a fatwa.

The Anonymous Borg are a relatively recent mutation of Anonymous. Like The Borg -the hivemind alien race bent on universal pwnage in Star Trek- they suffer from huge amounts of unwarranted self-importance and a superiority complex.

These anons gone rogue have decided that they speak for all of Anonymouskind because THE INTERNET IS SERIOUS BUSINESS and they know what's best for anon. Meanwhile, it is well documented that basement dwelling, 13-year-old virgins with no IRL friends couldn't organize a piss-up in a brewery and should have their Internets confiscated by Al Gore until their balls drop and they stop playing in their tree fort.

Contents

[edit] Mission

Their main mission (apart form /i/insurgency in general) is to recruit like-minded spastics into a personal army to unite all Anonymous -from 4chan, to 7chan, to 420chan, to Jackie Chan- into an organised force with a 'central command' and uniform 'thinking'. However, like a fascist dictatorship, the 'brain trust' of Anonymous Borg has already decided everything and debate and dissent is not an option.

[edit] Delusions Of Grandeur

The Anonymous Borg like to tell site owners how they should run their sites as if they were the board of directors at a Fortune 500 company. Whilst they contribute little-to-nothing content-wise and nothing financially, they will not be denied.

In the following "morality play", the part of unwarranted self-importance is played by Locutus_of_Lulz and the Soup Nazi is played by moot.
<Locutus_of_Lulz> We are Locutus of Anonymous
<Locutus_of_Lulz> You will respond to our questions.
<Locutus_of_Lulz> Your use of a public IRC netowrk is less efficent for Anonymous and to you.
<Locutus_of_Lulz> We have established a large and stable network, just for Anonyous
<Locutus_of_Lulz> Lulznet.
<Locutus_of_Lulz> irc.lulz.net
<Locutus_of_Lulz> aka irc.partyvan.org aka irc.lulzhost.net
<Locutus_of_Lulz> It is the combined servers of many chans.
<Locutus_of_Lulz> 7chan has joind, fapchan as well; 420chan will when they update their server software.
<Locutus_of_Lulz> the /i/nsurgents built it off our several servers.
<Locutus_of_Lulz> The Patriotic Nigras have added their servers.
<Locutus_of_Lulz> Great things are afoot.
<Locutus_of_Lulz> We will await your return
<Locutus_of_Lulz> But we know that moving #4chan onto the central node is most efficent for all parties.
<moots> not happening
<moots> irc is stupid
<moots> go away

Later, that same day:

<Locutus_of_Loli> We do not wish to hinder the progress of 4chan
<Locutus_of_Loli> But we must sadly attack until /b/ conforms to the will of Anonymous.
<Locutus_of_Loli> We shall double the dataforce.
<moots> uh okay
<moots> i am going to go make soup now

[edit] Tactics

  • When Anonymous Borg 'speak' (usually thru IRC), you'll notice the mouthpiece in question will use the royal "we" as in: "We needs to go potty, brb."

[edit] Analysis

Soon to be grounded by their parents, these idiots are not much of a threat but extremely effective at creating huge amounts of drama and FAIL; and thus EPIC LULZ.

By violating many of their own (very gay) Rules of the Internet their whole 'point' is rendered moot.

By trying to organise chaos, they show a limited understanding of how the Internets and IRL work. They also seem to speak English as a second language since they don't seem to understand what "random" means and/or (being the namefags they are) the nature of the "anonymity". Not that Anonymity works on IRC.

They also fail it at marine biology, since trying to localise piss in a sea off piss is impossible.

In short, they should all gb2Gaia get the fuck of the Internets, gb2school and focus on becoming bureaucratic fucks when they grow up.

In the meantime, they should be made to watch Anon's favourite film -V for Vendetta- until they understand how to inspire and stir the collective consciousness into giving a shit.

[edit] The Argument for and against Anonymous Borg

Well there is a case for assimilation...
Well there is a case for assimilation...



[edit] Notable Anonymous Borg

[edit] See Also

[edit] External Links



Anonymous Borg is part of a series on the *Chans

Important People: Anonymous - /b/tards - Ian - Internet Vigilante Group - Kirtaner - Moot - Nigras - W. T. Snacks - Symbion
The Chans: 2chan - 4chan - 5chan - 7chan - 8chan - 711chan - 12chan - 420chan - Fchan - Fapchan - Wakachan - not4chan - AnonIB - List of *chan boards - Wikichan - BBWChan
Popular Boards: /b/ - /i/ - /po/ - /s/ - /v/ - /x/
Attention Whores: Acky-chan-cray - Anonynurse - Anton - Aru - Balloonpoppop - Boochan - Chin-chan - Chris-chan - Cracky-chan - Drawbunny-chan - Gang of Four - Holy Grail - Line Trap - Loli-chan - Manatee-chan - Martini-chan - Mudkipchan - Nintendo-chan - Oldchan - Reverse trap chan - Stoner-chan - Trap-kun - Togi-chan - Up-Chan - V-Chan - Rat-Chan-Almost-Chan
Victims: Applemilk1988 - Chris Forcand - Douglas L Payne Jr - Drawball - Dylan Tnga - Ernest Peters - GoddessMine - Habbo Hotel - Hal Turner - Jake Brahm - Jarrad Willis - Linksys - Marbleman - Megachiropetra69 - NBC.com Forums - Poeticirony - Smugfag - StileNet - Trey Burba - Windeh - teenchatcenter.com - XxPrincessPunkxx
Mortal Enemies: Alex Wuori - Angyl - Anonymous Borg - CeLe - Fox News - GayDiamond - Lulznet - XyriX
Events: The Great Habbo Raid of July 2006 - 4chan fgt hat day - /b/-day - /b/space Day -Bring Back Snack Campaign - The Fox Hunt - The Great Chan Death of January 2007 - The Great Em/b/assy Security Leak of 2007 - The Great Re/b/oot - The Caturday Nap - ZonDay - The Chemo That Is Curing /b/ - Walmart Raid - brb, compromised - The Caturday Revival

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