Cosplay
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Cosplay is an abbreviated term which stands for "costume play." It also is the least cool thing evar. As a hobby it was first promulgated by the Japanese, who would dress up like certain anime, manga or video game characters. Eventually this habit crossed the Pacific to the United States, where it was adopted by fat basement-dwelling,pedophiles , nerds and sixteen year-old fangirls.
"Cosplayers," as members of the subculture call themselves, are all rabid attention whores, spending countless hours crafting their outfits for the express purpose of winning meaningless awards (read: attention) at sundry conventions. A good many cosplayers are also camwhores, posting seemingly endless photographs of themselves on LiveJournal, or else on their personal blogs or websites.
Cosplayers make a tasty snack when baked at 45° celcius due to their high concentration of fat.
- note* cosplayers (more so the girls) are HUGE drama whores, so troll a few and post here for lulz.
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[edit] Furries & Cosplayers
Though frequently confused with furries, cosplayers adamantly maintain that the two share nothing in common. In this opinion they are, of course, entirely wrong.
Much like furries, cosplayers suffer from personal identity issues, in that they seek to escape the burden of their real-world personas by becoming something much "cooler." Similarly, cosplayers will, in the same disgusting manner as furries, often fuck one another while wearing their absurd costumes. Members of both subcultures spend an inordinate amount of time involved in their "hobby," furthermore, including attending conventions and spending money on subculture-specific paraphernalia.
The two groups are only disassociated by the fact that furries emulate animals, whereas cosplayers emulate cartoon characters. Or not.
An example of a cosplayer on Livejournal. Look! No ears!
[edit] Women of cosplay
In research proven almost 100 years ago, cosplay is done 95% of the time by the plainest, palest, mouse-like, unbangable girls you went to high school with. These girls are easily spotted by the lack of fucking color to their skin (lol albino basement dwellers), nappy un kept hair (unless its under a nappy wig), and the inability to put on a decent coat of foundation or eye liner.......yet somehow sew some elaborate fucking costume to parade in.
HEY COSPLAY WEABOOS: PUT ON SOME FUCKING MAKEUP OR GET SOME SUN FOR CHRIST SAKE.
The reason these girls cosplay, is because its the only time of their lifes that they can get their snatch off at being gawked at by men. Most weaboo males are so full of fetish they will completely ignore the granny panty wearing, hairy upper lip, plain jane under the sailor uniform~ just so long as they can rub balls up against her sweet fuku.
The very...very small % of cosplay females that actually ARE fuckable to a small extent, instantly become giant fucking cunts with attention whore egos over 9000 since they are the only decent lay in a field of pasty legs and lop-sided breasts. Sadly the queen cunts tend to forget that outside the cons and DA, no decent looking normal guy wants to fuck them~ and they are nerds and keg party last resorts once more.
The only truly hot cosplay comes from asia, but even those are rare sightings. Compare for yourself...
 Teh Rei |
 Friends dont let friends cosplay as sakura |
 Sometimes America does it better though |
[edit] Men of cosplay
The men of cosplay are a little less plentiful and bitchy, but just as pathetic. Men usually cosplay to desperately get ass from girls who want to fuck the character, since like the females these men are sex deprived and wallflowers who can only get hugs and female contact when they have on the spiky anime wig. Men also cosplay because they enjoy pretending that they are a fucking hero (Always from a final fantasy game) and not in fact a part-time employee at the local Sam Goodie. The alarming number of neko fags among men had risen with the current cable anime epidemic. Even weaboo male that don't cosplay will still slap on cat ears, tail, and a fucking pet collar~ while they munch on Pooky and scratch the acne on their ass.
The most freighting of all is the growing number of straight men that will put on sailor uniforms or cosplay as female anime characters. Fags do it because they are fags....straight guys do it because they are desperate attention whores that are so hungry for sex they don't care who fucks or glomps (see fail rape) them.
Due to the rise in faggotry actions of the men, women will be turned-off so bad they will start making out with the "straight" chicks that cosplay as male characters, and finally.. HUMAN KIND WILL CEASE TO REPRODUCE AND DIE. FUCKING DIE OUT. THANKS MALE NEKO ANIME FAGS!!!!!!
[edit] Male cosplay consists of
- Wanabe heroes (99% cosplay as Inuyasha, Naruto, Cloud, Squall, or Vash)
- Guys that are fucking ugly and do it for attention ( Cloud, Sasuke, and Gaara cosplay usually)
- Fags that dress up like female characters (ones that really try tend to look better than the real girls)
- Weaboo Fags that just put on a skirt + cat ears, but dont shave or put on a wig
- Furries
- A Naruto headband only.
[edit] Niggra and cosplay
Since the japanese don't usually associate anime with black people, very little anime characters are black. Any time one tries to cosplay as a creamy asian character, the results are lulz worthy
 Did someone say fried chickens? |
[edit] True story
To prove they point that some cosplay fags are not just fags, they don't even fucking try...please consider the following true story:
(Weeaboo) Hey, I just got this dress...what should I cosplay as? What do I look like?
walks up in STAINED old nappy red prom dress that does not even zip over her back fat. Nothing else, just a dress on.
(Victim) Uh....what kid?
(Weeaboo) This dress, I got it off of ebay for $1! Who do I look like so I can enter the contest???
(Victim) uh.... thinks long and hard I guess Anthy from Utena had a red dress....but that thing does not even...
(Weeaboo) Whats Utena?
(victim) You dont know Utena? I thought everyone knew that fucking show
(Weeaboo) No, I only watch anime on adult swim! Name something I look like off adult swim!!
(victim) .....
victim does a roundhouse kick and knocks the weeaboo heifer across the room
GTFO!!!
[edit] Hall of shame
 A typical fan of cosplay. |
 Gambit uses cards to defeat evil. |
||
 Moar typical cosplay fans. |
 What is it? WHAT IS IT? |
 Proof of a caring God. |
 Cosplay conventions often attract celebrities. |
 Fatass no jutsu! |
 It's retard time, kids! |
 The infamous Man Faye |
 Gay |
 Yugimanz! |
 IT'S OVER 9000 POUNDS! |
 100% Perfect cosplay |
 Sexy, curvy, caveman-like facial features |
 Dats sum sexy cosplay T&A! |
 Just...no. |
 I cant tell if Kikyou is a dude or not... |
|
 Furry cosplay prostitutes. |
 Less pie, moar sun plz |
 thanks for crushing my childhood with your giant fat ass |
 Chobits...more like choCHUNKS |
 I wish I were them |
 Gundam cosplayers think people will run around in armor... in the future. |
 Upon closer examination, I learned Robin is really a weaboo fag! |
|
 When we said "you guys need a hobby," we didn't mean this. |
 Faye family. |
 Ironically, she is dressed as Lust... |
 A typical fangirl of Naruto. |
 A typical fanboy of Naruto. |
 Azn cosplay of a sexy ninja. |
 Cosplaying with my girlfriend is awesome! |
 Same couple as before. |
[edit] The only acceptable cosplay
You are still a fgt for cosplaying, but the following is acceptable and will not get rocks thrown at you:
 Gendo cosplay is always ok |
 Katamari cosplay of any kind, it gives too many lulz to not be ok |
 Transformer cosplay~ FUCK YOU, it just is. |
 Cosplay as Quail Man at an ANIME con is win |
 Monty Python cosplay~ always in vogue |
 KICKASS! |
 Hardgay |
 Mayor Mc Cheese? |
 Perhaps the cosplay to end all cosplay. |
 A Cos is ok too |
 Scary? |
 Jesus Cosplay FTW! |
 lol, wut. |
 It's motherfucking Overlord Lucan D'Lere! |
[edit] Cosplay Skits
When walking around in costume does not get the cosplay weaboos rocks or taco off enough, they give a go at performing on stage for the whole con to see. Since anime fans lack any real skill in anything (dancing, singing, acting, choreography) since anime fans really dont have any hobbies outside anime, it becomes a massive fail that the whole room is subject to watch for normally 2-7 painful minutes. 99% of these skits are bad, they they are not even funny to laugh at. Notice the cold silence after every "joke." If you are unfortunate enough to have to sit through a particularly fail performance, make sure you yell "tits or GTFO" and other choice quotes at them, the audience will appreciate it.
Some examples of cosplay skits include...
Fruits basket, THE MUSICAL.
If you know Evangelion well, this is the ONLY SEMI FUNNY COSPLAY SKIT KNOWN TO MAN.
Leave it to the japanese to do a good job...yet be SO WRONG AT THE SAME TIME.
Narutard no jutsu....the sad thing this skit is 100% true.
yet another example of amazing choreography and ribbon twirling on youtube...woooooow.
One Piece cosplayers. They're all like this pretty much.
[edit] Anime IRL
This is what it would look like if anime characters walked around earth like you and I
Thats one freaky, saucer-eyed, fat-headed creature. Not kawaii at all.
[edit] Ban list
This cosplay has been done to fucking death, and done so poorly SO OFTEN that is is illegal in 49 states ( save for Kentucky ) to cosplay as the following characters
- Sakura from "Naruto*
If you cosplay as sakura you have done it wrong, are fat, and had a shitty costume. Nobody likes you, just like nobody likes her
- Cloud from "FFVII"
Cloud is a fag, you are a fag. Your hair looks like someone shot cum in it, and its not cool to carry around a giant shitty cardboard sword
- Sora from "Kingdom Hearts"
Sora has big doppy shoes and a costume that is GAY AS HELL, so you look GAY AS HELL. Also, fuck your star fruits and nappy wigs.
- Rei or Asuka from "Evangelion"
You do not have the skills or body to pull off a plug suit, DONT DO IT. Fucking spandex Eva camel toe at every con
[edit] Some Cosplayers have their own Websites
These are some classic examples of their sites.
[edit] See Also
- Adella
- Basement dweller
- Bunnydragoon
- Comic book fans
- Cosplayfucks
- Kipi
- Hellsingripvanwinkle
- Meele
- Saeto
- Weeaboo
- Yuffie bunny
- Kim_the_Cheater
- Ayumihamilton
- Axelswife1
- Usagi Kou
[edit] External links
- Two English geeks attend a Tokyo Cosplay Convention (YouTube)
- At an Anime Convention
- Note the woman winner did nothing but glue some horns on. People in the honorable mention section wasted hours.
- Characterhate, for anonymous roleplaying bullshit.
- Fat Yuna cosplays. DO NOT WANT!
- For rampant, mind-blowing what-the-fuckery, 24-7
