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Tay Zonday

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online hubris: Tay Zonday

This is Tay Zonday's jewish cousin:

Tay Zonday (who's real name is Adam [1]), a great singer with a voice lower than his manly six testicles. Tay was an internet Super meme, and a phenomenon. He rose to the attention of /b/ after stealing a bike, and singing Choklit Reighn, a song in which he sings about coping with jenkem abuse, and features the same repetitive piano hook for five minutes straight. Tay acknowledges that the song is crap, and deems it 'corny'.

[edit] Chocolate Rain

Now in gif form

**I move away from the mic to dodge a charged lazer

The song was shown to Anon on the outskirts of /b/ during July 11th, and has quickly eclipsed the time honored Rickroll, having been deemed the "Tayroll". This was helped in part by Carson Daly shitting all over the Rickroll a month prior. (Choklit rheinn, amirite?) In the song, Mr. Zonday performs his patented Stealth Breathing technique, wherein **he moves away from the mic to breathe in. This, however, is total bullshit because everyone knows that Tay Zonday is a fucking cyborg hell bent on raining chocolate all over North America. Lyrics can be found here.

[edit] When Science created a Supermeme

Tayroll takes Youtube by storm.

Although at first, Zonday was wary of the sudden burst in popularity he'd received from 4chan, he eventually embraced it. On July 18th, Tay Zonday released a cover version of Rick Astley's Never Gonna Give you Up, and ascended the ranks of epic win, using his knowledge in Computer Science III to combine two of the greatest memes of our time. The video was deemed Tayroll by its creator, and noone objected. http://www.yougottayrolled.com/ USE IT TO TAY ROLL YOUR FRIENDS!

moar and finally moar rain

[edit] July 26th - ZonDay

figured it out

On July 26th, Zonday released yet another epic video entitled 'Internet Dream'. Moments after it was released, Youtube staff recognized Zonday as an Internet deity and put the top Chocolate Rain-related videos on the front page all day and posted a blog declaring that July 26th is officially ZonDay.

Also on July 26th, Moot showed that he still cares about Anon, and decked out /b/ in honor of ZonDay, adding Chocolate Rain references everywhere, including an embedded remix of the song. You can listen to it here. However, constant MySQL connection failures made everything extremely unfunny.

You can view the YouTube page, preserved for purity, here.

[edit] Intertube Dreamz

In that video at 1:20, he impersonates his mom. That's what she really sounds like!

Shut all the blinds, oh, you might've been seen watching this crap.

Shittin' alone with your Internet Dream!

[edit] July 31st

A radio station in england talked about Tay and his chocolate rain song this happened at about 01:48 in radio1 link and again at 01:55 A youtube video was made of this yt link

[edit] August 9th

Tay Zonday performs on Jimmy Kimmel Live; the beginning of Tay selling out

Comments show that no matter how bloated he becomes on mcdonalds and drugs 16-yr old girls wil still fawn for his AIDS stick

Choqlit Reign Verizon Wireless commercial.

[edit] August 10th

Tay Zonday owner of the internets makes it onto "This Morning" in the UK

[edit] August 11th

Tay Zonday is the ~~top story~~ on Yahoo.

[edit] August 14

Muslim extremists took advantage of an jewtube exploit and reduced Tay Zonday's number of subscribers to zero, taking him from number one to over nine thousand.

[edit] The Only Way

[2] AKA Chocolate Rap, The Only Way proudly continues Zonday's string of lulzy videos. The song, akin to Choqlit Reighn, attempts to make some sort of political statement. This of course falls flat on its face due to the fact that all Tay's lyrics are batshit insane. From what can be understood, Zonday "raps" about materialism like 50 Cent, but then pulls a Bono and rants about third world, sending many mixed messages. He cuts through all that by proclaiming that he's the mystical offspring of Captain Planet and Raptor Jesus. The chorus consists of an autistic repetition of "The Only W-W-W-W-W-W-W-WAY is Tay ZOND-D-D-D-D-D-D-DAY." Also [HE CANT HEAR YOU].

UPDATE: THIS IS NOT A BRAG TRACK
According to Gay Zonday, he states "THIS IS NOT A COCKY BRAG TRACK! "Tay Zonday" symbolizes education and consciousness. The lyrical symbolism is pretty deep and this is perhaps the most selfless song that I've written." Zonday is finally selling his used-to-be-free music, even though nobody will ever buy it.

[edit] August 18

Tay Zonday appeared on CNN and was interviewed by some other nigra. He asked him some gay questions and they had a great time.

[edit] September 3

[edit] NIGGA CANT DANCE

An example of early Chocolate Rain 34

Aside from his uncanny skills in moving away from the mic , its pretty obvious that when it comes to dancing, Tay happens to have two left ~~feet~~ testicles. So to compensate for his prior 'Brag track', he decided to write a more depriving song. But dont worry, he still comes off as self-absorbed in the end. At first the only golden moment is when he says, "Some like to salsa dance," and pretends to choke down a big mexican dick. But then his face contorts and he grabs his ass, taking his own butthurt and almost turning it into an austere taunt. Then the screen goes piss-yellow, and Zonday does what he does best; making a spectacle and being a complete idiot in the process.

[edit] September 23

[3]In a ten minute vlog highlighting his "surprise" visit to meet the Jewtube staff, it has finally been shown/ confirmed that Tay Zonday is, infact, a human being after all. It's also been confirmed that Tay is from, and currently resides in the internets (2:50 in at 7:12). It is also revealed he wears make-up. What a fag.

[edit] October 4th

Tay has know released so many fucking songs on Jewtube his ego has exploded and formed new life in iraq, meanwhile, people continue to slate him for being big headed and making shite songs.

[edit] October 29th

[edit] My Ego is Too Big For You

**Anonymous Delivers

Just when we thought that he couldn't get any worse. He spends the entire song bragging about his shoes that he bought from a 99 cent store 5 minutes before filming the video. Despite dedicating an entire song about his inability to dance, he insists on showing off his dance moves that make Rick Astley look good. At the end, he makes another reference to aliens.

[edit] November 16th

[edit] Last Laugh (at Tay)

Anon didn't think too much of this. One incident of selling out isn't really a big deal, especially if it's for a shitty commercial that barely anyone saw. However, this was foreshadowing for things to come the next week.

[edit] November 23rd

[edit] Tay did WTC!

Having succumbed to acidic levels of failure; Zonday delivers another putrid performance to the tune of Amazing Grace. But this time to prove he means serious business, he slurs out a patriotic ballad about September Eleventh that would surely make the eagles cry. Too bad the Internet Hate Machine that made him popular doesn't give a flying fuck about 9/11, except maybe to mock and blame others. The video might have been filmed somewhere near WTC's ruins, but the camerawork is too schizophrenic to tell. So basically you get a sappy song and a close-up of his ugly Gremlin face. Now if only a plane would hit Tay Zonday, amirite?

Ironically, the idea that Tay did 9/11 has been around for awhile. Maybe those Jews really are off the hook.

[edit] November 28th

[edit] **I Move Away From the Mic to Sell Out

As of Wednesday, November 28th 2007 Tay Zonday has sold out and has become a corporate whore. But he is yet to face the unfettered wrath of Anonymous, the very force that propelled him to e-fame. So it created this supermeme, so it can reduce Tay to a miserable pile of BAWWWWWWWW, just like every other lolcow they've milked. You should've given us more credit than this "internet thing" Tay.

Also, note the dead squirrel at 2:30 (22 sec remaining). It's raid time, bitch!

[edit] Criticism

Some argue that Zonday is merely an opportunist who used the death of Kirby Puckett to position himself as the second biggest black celebrity in Minnesota, after Prince. However, this is unlikely as neither Prince nor Zonday have ever been confirmed to actually be black. Anyone who thinks that joke was funnier the way Chris Rock told it should note that it was't stolen, because the addition of Tay Zonday made it better.

[edit] Gallery of Zonday

THAT ISN'T CHAWKLET D:	Knowing is half the battle.	worse than not much else.	Ebaumsworld is funny and original!
Nothing can stop the Chocolate Reign	Tubgirl is a fan of Chocolate Rain.	$0.01 so black people could afford it	Tay embraces hiz Choklit Rayne
to late, lulz	It's Choclit Reihn!	Chocolate Rain candy from RobertasChocolates.com	Destined to be the best movie ever.
BIX NOOD	yaaaay!11/	Art, Bitch	Chocolate Rain
Tay Zonday loves the insults.	Bitches don't know 'bout mah KFC	Even Buttsecks Owl luvs Chocolate Rain!	Tay's Lineage
The Many Faces of Tay Zonday			CHOKLIT REIHN!!
I just rained.	Tay wants to rape your internet dreams.	Chocolate Gay.	Mudkip Rain
Zonday moves away.	Chocolate Rain, Lemon Party edition.	How do I rained chocolate?	Tay Zombay
Tay gonna choke a bitch.	lol wut?	A contender for "The Rain of Chocolate"?	4chan's /b/ on July 26th.
Anonymous keeps on delivering	IMMA CHARGIN MAH RAIN.	An hero.

[edit] Moar Rain

[edit] See also

[edit] External Links


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