Israel
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| Warning: This article is about Jews or Israel. Therefore, you will find that the editors for this article are primarily of Jewish descent. But don't worry: They do not have any particular agenda. | 
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| WARNING! This article contains Jews! |
Israel (Hebrew: ישראל Arabic: Noone gives a fuck) -like Hollywood- is a country run by gay Jews in the middle of Arabia. It's a country founded on stolen soil after WW2 by butthurt Jews who believed that it was God's (who they don't believe in) will that they have a Promised Land and the United Nations who needed to find somewhere to put the most hated people on Earth. Sadly, no one has been successful in many attempts to drive the Jews into the sea, not even the Nazis.
Israeli sharpshooters always aim for the arms when putting down intifadah riots. Due to the fact that Slurpee machines require two hands to operate properly, no 7-11 stores exist in all of Israel. Their loss.
However, enterprising Jewish businessmen have begun funding the production of machines capable of turning Palestinan babies into Slurpees. This is in full accordance to international law, as Palestinians do not share the same rights as humans.
[edit] Current Events
- Recently, Israel bas been trying to provide Jewenstine, the mascot and god of the Heebs, with some more Lebensraum in the Lebanon. Much pwnage has occurred.
- Last Thursday, Israel waged war on Lebanon's international airport, causing major delays.
- For at least 100 years, organizations like Hamas and Hezbollah have been blowing themselves up because they are attention whores.
- Jews did Beirut as performance art to protest Holocaust denial -and for the lulz- after they fell hard for the classic Hezbollah troll of kidnapping IDF soldier boys.
[edit] History
When the Allies advanced towards Berlin in the late 1944, they discovered the true proportions of the horrors in the German extermination camps. Millions of Jews, suffering from diseases, barely walking from hunger and malnutrition, humiliated beyond human by their torturers poured out of gates of Auschwitz, Birkenau and other places. Something needed to be done about it.
Fortunately, the Nazis had some allies that were still not defeated, and too retarded to pose any military threat to the civilized world - the Sand Niggers. So most of the Jews were sent to Palestine, and the Western World hoped that four hundred million Arabs would quickly push four hundred thousand Jews into the sea once the Poms left the area. Unfortunately, the stupidity of the Arabs was severely underestimated, resulting in epic fail. This led to establishment of a Jew state for the first time in at least 100 years. Thus, in solving the Jew problem, we are basically back to square one.
The premature decision to invade Germany, and subsequent underestimation of how retarded Arabs were, made Roosevelt die from guilt, and ruined Churchill's carrier after the war. Stalin managed to avoid the blame until after his death. Some argue that the cold war was a direct result of Western Allies and the Soviet Union blaming each other for not fully actualizing the Final Solution. This strife naturally fueled the rebirth of the jew economic conspiracy.
After the Jews easily won 3-4 wars against Arabs, they (Jews) kinda started to enjoy it. The Americans soon got the sniff of it, and started their own party in the Gulf, where no Jews were invited. The Jews felt depressed that Americans didn't invite them to the party, and, like, totally lost interest in pwning the Sandniggers themselves. Instead they began bitching about it to Americans, constantly playing on the Holocaust guilt. And incredibly, Americans started to feel sorry for them! They started sending weapons to Israel, hoping it'd make them feel better. And it did! The sandniggering party in Lebanon was, like, totally fabulous!
| Did you know that... Israel gave Peru a huge donation after the recent gigantic earthquake But it was fucking tiny donation, because they're Jews. amirite? |
[edit] Israel and flame wars
If you get involved in a flame war relating to the Irsaeli-Palestine conflict and want some Zionists on your side, consider inviting the following people:
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