Death Cab For Cutie
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Death Cab for Cutie is what you get when one metrosexual fails at music. There may or may not be other members in the band, but nobody gives a shit.
[edit] Ben Gibbard
Ben Gibbard is a pretentious fucktard from Seattle. He is the lead singer of both Death Cab for Cutie and The Postal Service and definately thinks he is better than you because he can play the acoustic guitar and wears emofag thick rimmed glasses. Nothing makes him feel more original and expressive than looking like every other pseudo-intellectual 13 year old boy in the fucking world.
Gibbard is the kind of person to hang out at coffee shops and talk to others about how great he is. He is most definately a pedophile, and is prolly being hunted by the man for fucking a baby or something.
Ben ditched his bandmates from Death Cab for Cutie and formed The Postal Service with some guy he used to fuck in the ass every Wednesday when he lived in his mom's basement in Faggotville.
[edit] Sing Like Ben!
- Suck moar cock than Gay God.
- Gain over 9000 pounds.
- Hit yourself in the nose with a tire iron.
- Don't go to the hospital.
- Let your broken nose swell to fit your faggotty emo glasses.
- Insert both of your hands into your asshole.
- ???????????
- profit!
End result sounds like:
"Oy w'll faoowloow you intothedawrk". With practice, you too can rape ears like the masters!
[edit] External Links
- They couldn't even come up with their own name, they had to steal it from this stupid fucking song
- Rare clip of the group from 1967 (all the original members are probably dead!)
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Death Cab For Cutie is part of a series on Music. |
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Categories: Stub | Music
