Gackt
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Gackt (Ga-ku-to) is the most wanted man in Japan-world, due to receiving enough plastic surgery to look like a generic anime character. He has the voice of an eunuch, and may very well be one of the biggest IRL trolls for his ability to trick millions of people into thinking he has "talent".
He is officially the most over-rated Japanese "artist" of all time. Other than the fact that he can sing in a high pitch for long periods (kind of like a twisted Japanese version of Mariah Carey) he has very little real use besides taking it in the ass.
He enjoys wearing tight clothes, and boasts about his "magnum" (AKA his penis), leading all his teenage girl fans across the world to assume that he's as hung as a horse. But fact is, he's asian. And everyone knows because asian men do enough buttsex, incest and rape as it is, god denied them big dicks to do it with. Gackt's of course, is especially minuscule. Apparently, it's well known that he can do the splits perfectly, the reason why being his freakishly small junk seems to bulge more while he does it. Magnum indeed. When he realizes someone's figured out his tiny secret, he'll probably go write a shitty ballad about it.
Gackt is batshit. He thinks he's a vampire and doesn't like to be in direct sunlight. When he goes to preformances and talk shows, he becomes an uber diva and demands the lights be dimmed in his glorious presence. He also happens to be a perfectionist, and when he discovers that someone is better at something than he is, he obsessivly strives to become better than the other person (see: attention whore). Despite what he's fooled the fangirls into thinking with Internet Disease and whore makeup, he's isn't very good-looking. To be more precise, he looks like what most J-Rocker males look like, a heroin-addicted woman.
[edit] Fandom
Fangirls across the world seem to give Gackt the credit he deserves though, without realizing it. By writing erotic stories about him taking it in the ass from other JROCKer males, specifically Hyde from the "band" L'Arc~en~Ciel. Their butt-plugging adventures have also been made into a movie, Moonchild. In case you can't tell, it's gayer than the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy orgy special, and watching it will likely make any straight man's dick fall off. If it were ever broadcast in North America, it's likely the sound of millions of pale, ill-kept, centipede filled vaginas being abused would resonate through most of the continent, forcing the closure of most major businessess and government offices, and driving some meeker souls to suicide.
Although the Gackt fandom in and of itself is disturbingly dedicated (they become rabid easily, and thus very good for trolling), it must be stated that the fanfiction writen for him is usually the best-done smut found on the internets. Too bad it's prettymuch like looking at a brilliantly inspired painting of Goatse.
Jeffree Moon Famous JSTAR wannabe; is an adamant GACKT fan and lists him as one of his MANY crap inspirations...
Real quotes throughout Gackt-DUM
"O MY GACKT!" "SOOOOOOOOO Orgacktmic!"
[edit] Gallery
 Photoshop is so KAWII! |
 Plastic surgery is so KAWAII!! |
[edit] See Also
|
Gackt is part of a series on Music. |
|
|
