Morrissey
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
16 year old girls have Linkin Park, and emo and scene kids have Morrissey.
Morrissey - occasionally accused of being the lunatic responsible for emo, thanks to his amazingly insightful and witty lyrics (Come Armageddon! Come! Everyday is like Sunday, everyday is silent and grey!) - the modus operandi of every emo hipster, indiefuck and fat goth girl. Amazingly, he's escaped retribution for his numerous musical crimes against humanity - like an unstoppable juggernaut, decimating the music landscape of the day with his boring, angsty and self-indulgent ranting (See: Lowtax). The only thing stopping him has been the A+R men dropping him from their labels every 3 years, once they realise that he's immeasurably shit, and will never change.
He is best known for his "poetic" and boring lyrics about what a sad, old misanthrope he is and the fact that The Cure frontman, Robert Smith, hates his guts. Which is important, because complaintopia consider him The holy trinity or raptor jesus Nowadays, Morrissey is a wrinkly old fag selling his soul to millions of Hot Topic and scene kids with no self-esteem. Fortunately for Internets, his legion of fans, while tearing the sad git's lyrics to pieces (while searching in vain for some shred of meaningful prose), are responsible for many internet lulz. If you put the Cure or even that David Bowie album where there's a live track with the Cure, before or after the Smiths/Morrissey album, they start fighting. Its pretty neato.
This is a small mercy.
Morrissey is a former militant vegetarian and a former militant asexual, proving once again that he can talk a lot of shit, but when it comes down to it he just can't keep from stuffin' meat in his mouth, be it burgers or cock. (Note: Moz is still a vegetarian and still chaste, despite the myriad fat goth Tori Amos fans who want to fuck his brains out and cook an all meat-grill for him in the morning). He won't go to Canada because they club seal and eat all the cute little animals!
Morrissey is famous for his witty and acerbic put-downs of his detractors, so be careful not to get on his bad side. He famously described the writer of The Smiths' biography (Morrisey and Marr: The Severed Alliance), Johnny Rogan, as 'Johnny Rodent', if you can believe that. He also playfuly retitled the book 'The Sausage Appliance'. Linguistic genius such as this is a gift to be treasured.
According to him, there is panic on the streets of London, but as it turns out it was drunk football hooligans and there was no panic, but there was lots of Jager, a DJ was hung, and zombies were killed.
[edit] Morrissey as Lulz
Being cruel, sarcastic, and generally unpopular, many Morrissey fans have taken to embracing his work and personality in an ironic sense. This often involves the photoshopping of Morrissey images, bad fanfic, and fake suicide attempts expressed with his more morose lyrics.
It must be noted that the vast majority of ‘Morrissey iz teh lolzers’ are genuine fans who spend vast quantities of their money on The Smiths vinyl rather than social activities, in which they are not included. This is usually because they bore others with constant and vivid recreations of the day they found a ‘This Charming Man’ single for $3 in a charity store.
The intent of parody is often separation from the generic emo kids who consider one depressing song good reason to shop at Hot Topic.
In a completely separate set of lulz, spoken-word poet Eirik Ott also named The Smiths "How Soon is Now?" the anthem for wussy boys in his poem The Wussy Boy Manifesto.
[edit] Morrissey Causes An Heroes
It is widely suggested that Morrissey is the leading cause of suicide. It has also been suggested that suicide is the leading cause of Morrissey.
[edit] Morrissey's greatest moment
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Morrissey is part of a series on Music. |
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