13-year-old boy
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Also known as Shota. Much like 16 year old girls, 13-year-old boys can be found all over AIM, the AOL instant messaging program, or, in a less popular but more concentrated population, on BYOND. They are easily recognized as they lack an Adam's apple, and if you're a pedo, their lack of pubic hair. They make easy targets for drama baiting as their slavering worship of known fucktards Linkin Park, Coldplay, Fall Out Boy, Insane Clown Posse, Tony Hawk and Adam Sandler has recently reached a fever pitch. Many times they are found in str8, chat rooms lying about their age (preferring to be 18 year old boys), or in gay chat rooms (most likely they are 60-year-old (male) camwhores who like to chat with 13-year-old boys). When not online, 13-year-old boys can be found playing Yu-Gi-Oh, X-Box Live, and Candyland, as well as masturbating furiously to pr0n, or trying to date as many girls as possible, generating lulz.
They also, like 16 year old girls are very advanced at statistics. They, unlike the rest of us, are able to show that 92% of teenagers would stop breathing if Abercrombie & Fitch told them it was cool to do so. 92% also would cry if they were called a freak and have "moved on" from rock to rap. It is unclear whether this 92% are the same for each question polled. In fact, there is no record of any actual poll having taken place, but a million MySpace users putting this in their info can't be wrong.
While they are not as annoying as 16 year old girls they tend to have very bad spelling skills and like to say koo a lot. They also enjoy cussing a lot because it's koo and teh fucking shit beyotch LOLLZ OMFG!111. Beware that many of these 13-year-old boys are really FBI agents trying to entrap innocent members of NAMBLA, who are just upstanding citizens out for a good time, as they say. 13-year-old boys make up about .123456789% of the total teen population. Due to their rarity, a repopulation program is underway and you probably want to breed with them, you sick fuck.
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[edit] Charming Naïveté
13 year-old boys are easy as hell to manipulate via the internets because of their trust of anyone they believe to be in authority and predominantly remorseful nature once confronted with objections to whatever it is they're doing at the time. There are many ways to go about wrangling a 13-year-old boy, such as offers of candy or threatening to have them banned from their favorite Pokemon forum. Use your newfound control for having them star in your latest YouTube submission or enacting lulz-ridden revenge.
You dumb nigger, AIDS is a sexually transmitted disease. There's no way in hell he could ever get it.
[edit] Quotes by 13-year-old boys
| —urbandictionary |
| —A 22 years old kid? wrong answer son |
[edit] Ambitions
- To get level 80 on Runescape!!!!!1
- To get laid by someone other than your mom
- To raise their status in the server from 3 to 9000.
- To know something other than jack shit about drugs
- To be in the Delta Force, just like in bLaCk HaWk dOwN!!!!!!!
- To launch b0mBs at skool!!
- To see Britney Spears live!!
- To bcom GM in a 20+plyr game!!
- To be a Ninja
- 2 B FIRST RANK ON THER CS SERVER!!!!
- To be a ghetto nigga
- To cuss a lot (Which all do)
- To sprout ball hair
- To bang Klara Wagner
- To impregnate 16 year old girls
- To beat Through Fire And Flames on expert
- To be bisexual(girls think bi dudes are HAWTT!)
- To get a girlfriend that doesn't live in the same house.
- To get their penises past 2 inches.
- To make it to 14 years old.
- To get a life.
- To be a rockstar
- To post pictures of their childlike faces on /b/.
- To fellate Herman Li.
[edit] The Very Best of 13-year-old boys
[edit] Notable 13-Year-Old Boys
- Angry German Kid
- Cheddar-Cheesia
- Trey Burba
- Mitchell Henderson
- DJ Skeptik
- HTS-Noob
- DaxFlame
- davedays
- Dog264
- Flameviper
- Flardox
- Seth Dub
- PivotRJ
- youngconservative
- MySpace Kid
- Jawsus
- BodyXPolitic
[edit] Fun Facts
- 13 year old boys don't have to be 13. They can be 10 to 16. They can even go as far as 18. As they say, the younger the better.
- It is totally legal to rape a 13 year old boy, as long as you do it with a condom and don't get caught.
- Don't bother pwning a 13 year old boy; he will say "Your Mom", resulting in EPIC WIN...
- Every single 13 year old boy must beg to get his way.
- Every 13 year old boy kills aleins and doesn't afraid of anything
- To humiliate a 13-year-old boy, just mention to him that the average penis size is 5.75 inches, then mention that at his age you were 10". Watch the tears flow.
- Every 13 year old boy must bot to win PC games.
- Every 13 year old boy will annoy the shit out of you no matter how or where.
[edit] See also
- 12 year old girls
- Shotacat
- Pedobear
- BodyXPolitic
- Kyle Forrest
- Mark Foley - A gay old pedophile who is hungry for 13 year old boys
- Michael Jackson
- Ultraviolet News Network
- Teenager
- 30 Seconds To Mars
- Runescape
- Pew-bertee
- T. Reginald Gibbons wants to protect every 13 year old boy.
[edit] External Links
- Can a teenage guy get an erection just from hugging a girl?
- Typical 13 year old boys love sex and video games
- Textbook Example of a "funny" 13 year old
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