Quake

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Not a Doom ripoff, because it's made by the same company!

A typical Quake player. Notice the unkempt, dirty clothes and the atrophied eyes brought on by a lack of natural light.

A game created at least 100 years ago, Quake was one of the first truly 3-dimensional first person shooter games. Players walk through a mundane castle and dungeon areas, encountering zombie fish, zombie dogs, zombie soldiers, and standard zombie zombies, all hellbent on tearing your flesh to pieces.The game helped to spark a gaming revolution, which in turn created jobs for the basement-dwelling losers which natural selection would normally pwn and recycle.

Multiplayer

Simple weekend 2-player mode has been completely done away with, as Quake's then-advanced server/client system of multiplayer revolutionized the art of sitting on one's ass, while organizations such as the Cyberathlete Professional League have taken the meaning of 'pathetic' to levels known previously only in myth and legend.

Other

Quakes are also natural disasters, ironically caused by gamers who get up from their steel-reinforced chairs in order to purchase the latest ergonomic snacktrays for their 'rig.' Despite causing hundreds of thousands of deaths and billions of dollars in damage, these disasters are not nearly as important as the game, as made clear by Google Images.