Aertheca

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Contents

[edit] History

Greetings traveler and welcome to the serious business of Aertheca, a world inhabited predominately by whining bitches, short drunkards and rapists, attention whores with pointy ears, more short midgets, "Halflings" (or, more accurately, human children), and some other races which mostly power builders and wankers use.

By the way... whoever wrote the rest of that history on the site has too much fucking time on their hands.

[edit] RP Rules

1. All characters must be the same stereotypical, b-grade fantasy creatures, or else you will never get approval.

2. If you make any attempt at forming an original character that breaks the stereotypes, the DMs will be jealous of your AMAZING creativity and you will be asked to change everything about your character that makes them interesting.

3. Attempting to have any degree of fun is highly frowned upon.

4. Never attempt to reason with any DM at any time, they are all-knowing and far more intelligent than you can possibly imagine.

5. Characters are allowed to be any alignment, but if you choose anything that isn't in the Good alignment, your character will never receive RP tokens.

6. Talking about anything in-character that does not include politics about the wars that noone cares about will result in you receiving no tokens.

7. If you play a female character and she is not a Mary-Sue, you will never receive RP tokens.

8. Being creative will not earn you RP tokens.

9. Breathing will result in you never receiving RP tokens.

10. And remember, have fun!

[edit] Available Classes on Aerthca

These are the main classes on Aertheca.

  • Fighter - played by Internet tough guys, this character was designed for pussies who get beaten up a lot IRL and want to pretend to be tough.
  • Wizard - this character can use magick skills such as Telekinesis and PowerWord: IRL Name. Everyone plays a wizard because they kick ass.
  • Cleric - see Fred Phelps. Played by those who like to be the heal-bitch for everyone else, especially fighters.
  • Rogue - Thievish abilities. Also responsible for killing the party several times on botched disarm trap rolls. Usually played by weeaboos who want to be like Naruto but wind up sucking because they spend all of their skill points in shit that doesn't actually keep them or anyone else alive.
  • Monk - a kung-fu type warrior (for the wapanese). At higher levels become fucking invulnerable and kill people in one hit, but everyone's a dumbfuck and plays a fighter instead of these guys.
  • Paladin - a strict code forces these characters to be faggoty pussies, much like the players themselves, which causes this to be such a popular class among nerds.
  • Bard - Most cyber whores.
  • Druid - Is a pagan who pretends he can shapeshift but in actuality just puts on a fursuit and then losses all ability to talk or use weapons--can only skritch. Games like Baldur's Gate II had fursecution as a storyline where furries attacked the town of Trademeet.
  • Barbarian - Like a fighter, only they're from the uncivilized lands and can declare jihad about three times per day so they can smack the shit out of everyone else. However, they're generally played by retards and niggers.
  • Sorcerer - Wizards with less spells known but more per day and cast off of their charisma. Apparently they're the spawn of humans and dragons which makes them the most commonly played class by otherkin.

Also, as shown to the right, anyone who plays a character with the slightest RDD or PM in them is clearly gay. Some even combine the classes - those types of people are complete fucking morons. Other classes which make you a fag:

  • Assassins - Stop looking up girls' skirts, pedophile.
  • Arcane Archer - Clearly for those who have no ingenuity at making builds. Bunch of fairyies.
  • Blackguard - Who the fuck plays that?
  • Champion of Torm - Torm exists on Aertheca? Yeah, that's what I thought. Now shut the hell up and admit you took the class for divine wrath.
  • Dwarven Defiler - Stop running around naked.
  • Harper Scout - So fucking useless.
  • Shifter - Why don't you just go fucking cosplay instead?
  • Shadowdancer - See Assassin.
  • Weapon Master - I like your scythe, greatsword, rapier.

Image:PinkGinDress.jpg

[edit] Terminology

Player - Everyone that's on the server to have fun.

Character - The waste of time that you, the player, control.

DM - The wonderful staff members that are there to assure that you have as much fun as possible.

Admin - The higher staff members that are there to ensure that the DMs are making your life fun.

[edit] Meet the Staff

Dear rest of the staff: I don't care enough to put you up here.

[edit] Meet the Players

  • the_one_54321 - Enjoys teh flame. I wish my grass was emo like him, then it would cut itself.
  • DragonWR12LB - Not a wide receiver or a linebacker. More like this instead.
  • Aressa - Got drama?
  • SeinOW - Enjoys telling people what to do... much like Someone else I know. Also likes to alienate player's characters.
  • Morim - Just another moron who spends his time saying "Hey guuuyyyss, listen to me - you all are being teh dumb, guuuyyyyssss listen to me! - wow so cool AND who is a complete b-tard

Image:dwarf-r.jpg

More to be added later. Too god damn lazy right now.


Image:Gamecontroller.gif Aertheca is part of a series on Gaming.


This article is crap. You can help by completely re-writing it.
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