Red Hat

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Jump to: navigation, search
International thieves extraordinaire.
International thieves extraordinaire.

In the Linux world, Red Hat is king. No one does a better job of suckering people to buy a free product than Red Hat. Most Linux distributions are based on Red Hat somehow. Sun Microsystems hates Red Hat, and has made Solaris free because no one wants to pay money for something that is just as good, but can be had for free. This is despite the fact that you actually have to pay money for a decent-working Linux from Red Hat.

Red Hat produces two primary distributions: Fedora and Red Hat Enterprise Linux (RHEL). While Fedora is free, nothing works and it will destroy your computer. Only the fucktarded use Fedora. On the other hand, RHEL actually works but you have to pay lots of money for it, and only big, gigantic corporations actually bother doing it. Yet, because Red Hat is stupid enough to include source code in RHEL, other companies give it away for free. Anyone who bothers paying for RHEL is an idiot.

Alan Cox and Havoc Pennington work for Red Hat. Red Hat is also the only reason people use GNOME, the world's most functional and feature-rich window manager.

[edit] Origin of the Company Name

Red Hat was named after Richard Stallman's penis. The head of his cock is said to be big and red -- that if you could cut it off, you could wear it on your head like a hat. This, of course, has become a metaphor for how much Red Hat sucks, and why using any Red Hat-produced Linux is a form of castration. Which of course does little to differentiate it from the rest of Linux because all Linux distros are total fucking failures.

[edit] Fedora 8 Release

Initial impression of Fedora 8: "HAY GUYZ I'M A HAT"

[edit] Other uses

Not to be confused with the Red Hat Cult.

Personal tools

Bookmark and Share