Pitchfork

Assuming that they don't get rushed offstage by the Sandman in the middle of their New Year's gig at the Apollo, the Strokes will have an incredibly busy first few months of 2002. On January 19th, the band will play on a Jack Black-hosted episode of Saturday Night Live, causing concerned mothers across America to wonder what happened to the innocent days of the late 90s when every pop star was anorexic and got a weekly $500 dollar haircut. Pitchfork's demographics experts tell us that our typical reader is likely to enjoy this episode a good deal more than the recent Derek Jeter/Shakira fiasco. Readers of Boy's Life, however, will probably be disappointed.

Having conquered national television, the band will then set out on a two-month international tour. As you can see from the dates below, they will be playing in a variety of exotic locales they could only have dreamt of visiting back when they were sipping brandy in the oak-paneled comfort of their Swiss boarding school dorm rooms. The English dates should provide added entertainment, as concert-goers will also be able to watch the editorial staffs of NME and Q engage in a frenetic free-for-all, clawing and tearing at one another's Oasis t-shirts in an effort to get right up next to the stage where they can touch the hem of Julian Casablancas' garments. Dude heals.

In other Strokes news, an interview with the band is featured in the November issue of Penthouse. I hope Robert Guccione didn't think that, based on their name, the Strokes would be like that weird Impotent Sea Snakes band from Real Sex. Anyway, according to the band's website, the article is the "most truthful" thing yet written about them, so it should be a nice fit for this issue, which also contains the "least exaggerated genitals" in the history of Penthouse Forum. Keep your eyes open for the Teenage Fanclub interview in the February edition of Juggs.

02-12 Osaka, Japan - On Air Osaka
02-14 Nagoya, Japan - Club Quattro
02-15 Tokyo, Japan - Shibuya Ax
02-23 Leeds, England - Leeds University (make-up date from June)
02-24 Birmingham, England - The Academy (also a make-up date)
02-26 Brussels, Belgium - Ancinne Belguique
02-27 Cologne, Germany - Ewerk
02-28 Amsterdam, Netherlands - Paradiso
03-03 Oslo, Norway - Rockefeller
03-04 Stockholm, Sweden - Circus
03-06 Hamburg, Germany - Grosse Freiheit
03-07 Berlin, Germany - Columbia Halle
03-09 Vienna, Austria - Pepsi Music Hall
03-12 Milan, Italy - Alcatraz
03-13 Lyon, France - Transbordeur
03-15 Barcelona, Spain - Razzmatazz
03-16 Madrid, Spain - La Riviera
03-17 Bordeaux, France - Krakatoa
03-18 Paris, France - TBA
03-22 Glasgow, Scotland - Barrowlands
03-23 Edinburgh, Scotland - Corn Exchange
03-25 Manchester, England - Apollo
03-26 Cambridge, England - Corn Exchange
03-28 London, England - Brixton Academy
03-31 Dublin, Ireland - Olympia