The Strokes Take the Piss
Quick-thinking soundman puts Frog Eyes' 'Golden River' on P.A.

The majestic Cumberland River wends through nearly 700 miles of rolling Kentucky and Tennessee forest, connecting the coal-mining central region of Tennessee to the Ohio River. It was the home of Fort Donelson during the Civil War, a Confederate stronghold at Dover that Ulysses S. Grant and his gunboats overthrew back in 1862, and opened the river passage for the advance on Nashville. Capt. Vic Scoggin, a riverboat pilot and Navy veteran, swam the entire length of the Cumberland River in 1996 to protest its pollution. And now, capping the Cumberland's storied history like a pyramidion atop an obelisk: The Strokes have pissed in it.

According to Net Music Countdown, the violation of good taste occurred during a Strokes performance at the River Stages in Nashville on May 2nd. Singer Julian Casablancas reportedly told the audience, "I tried to take a leak during the fucking solo, but I didn't have the chance." Casablancas and guitarist Nick Valensi then walked to the back of the stage (behind which flowed the mighty Cumberland) and relieved themselves into its ancient waters. Expect eBay listings for "Vial of Cumberland River Water That The Strokes Peed In" to begin proliferating and selling for exorbitant sums. This could very well happen; remember the "Piece of Elian Gonzalez's Raft" eBay craze, where you could pay like $800 for what was probably a sliver of broomstick? And Elian never even "saved" rock and roll!

After returning to the stage, Casablancas offered an explanation for his behavior: "I'm drinking alcohol. I'm not drinking water; I'm not drinking juice. I'm drinking liquid cocaine." Look for The Strokes on their upcoming "Monumental Desecration" Tour, during which they'll be spitting on the Statue of Liberty, shitting on Grant's Tomb, farting toward The Vietnam Veterans Memorial, and thumbing their noses at the Wailing Wall.

Strokes: http://www.thestrokes.com
RCA: http://www.rcarecords.com