Pitchfork

Got a little extra cash from mowing lawns this summer? Or from, say, a massive inheritance, a game show victory, or the child labor racket? If not, you may as well stop reading now, because the following is directed solely at the fiscally well-endowed.

The interweb, as it's known to do, has been positively buzzing today with reports of an online auction for an insanely, absurdly, preposterously, unfathomably, overwrought-modifier-of-your- choosing-ly rare slab of test-pressed acetate from the one and only Velvet Revolver.

Oh wait, scratch that-- the one and only Velvet Underground. Seems that while in NYC's Chelsea hood in September 2002, a serendipitous young man from Montreal stumbled across an original 1966 test-pressing of an early version of The Velvet Underground & Nico, featuring alternative takes and mixes of nine of the uber-classic's ramshackle jams.

"ARGUABLY THE RAREST & MOST IMPORTANT ROCK 'N' ROLL AND POP-ART ARTIFACT IN THE WORLD", as the auctioneer subtly puts it, the record has been listed on eBay for the world to bid upon. It's believed to be the only one of its kind in existence, part of the storied Lost Scepter Studio Recordings, and an unparalleled snapshot of the VU during its infancy.

Best of all, our little Chelsea crate-digger bought this thing for 75 cents. It's a captivating tale of dumb luck and triumph in the face of-- er, mostly dumb luck, and you may read about it in the auction listing here.

As of press time, the record's going for a cool $19,000, and the auction ends December 8 around dinnertime (central)-- so if you don't want some chump bidder named "emoscreamo" to get his/her grubby hands on the most precious piece of plastic since Barbra Streisand's fifth nose, best pony up.