Statistics
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Statistics are numbers. These numbers can be used, finessed, and cited in order to pwn someone in a debate, or to make yourself look more intelligent than you actually are. Whether these numbers are actually factual or properly collected is irrelevant.
Most people who use statistics in everyday life are lusers who are too busy crunching numbers to leave their basement dwelling.
The unfortunate corollary is that most people who focus on statistics are rich and beautiful.
Famous Statistics
These statistics constitute common knowledge, and should be used in any debate in order to pwn your foe. (The best part of using statistics in debate is that no one can tell if you lie.) Remember: 94% of conservatives hate statistics!
- 49% of United States voters liked George W. Bush
- 100% of liberals fail to accept that.
- 18%of Americans like him now LOL.
- Leeroy Jenkins' raid group had a 32.33(repeating, of course)% chance of survival.
- 95% of mediacrat's sexual partners had herpes.
- At least 100% of mediacrat's sexual partners now have herpes.
- Quasidan's penis has caused vaginal bleeding due to its enormous size in 60% of the women it has fucked.
- 90% of badlydrawnjeff's articles are crap.
- 65% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
- One in 10 computers in America now houses some type of evil spirit.
- Ten out of ten non-gay men prefer a big black cock in their mouths.
See also
Statistics is part of a series on Language & Communication. |