Your Blog Blows, and Here’s Why 

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• MLB.com levels baseball’s playing field
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You started a blog. But after weeks of dutifully recording your daily goings on, you still haven’t gotten that book deal or a call to be on Oprah. What are you doing wrong? Melissa Lafsky – who under the nom de guerre Opinionista turned controversial rants about her mistreatment as an employee of a Manhattan law firm into media fame – offers this list of things that could be keeping your rocket ship to celebrity on the launchpad.

1. You aren’t kamikaze enough to risk your career by revealing the soul-crushing absurdity of your job.

2. You aren’t sufficiently vain or presumptuous to declare yourself a hot twentysomething female (even if it’s true).

3. You lack a diagnosed sleep disorder, minor substance abuse problem, mercurial temperament, and/or innate desire to alienate loved ones.

4. You’re not ready to declare on the Internet what you really think about the raging hypocrites nesting in your life.

5. You have yet to explore the wonders of shameless self-promotion, groveling, and media whoring. Profiles in The New York Times don’t always come free.

- Ruth Fowler

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