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Re: Frank Talk on Gay Stereotypes
On Tue, 25 Mar 1997, Anonymous Poster wrote:
> Come on, Khoa, get real. Sure, there is all kinds of straight misbehavior,
I can't help but get the Alanis Morisette song "Isn't ironic?" out of my
head when I read this. I'm usually the one that tells others to "get
real" and my cynical view of the world is well-known among my friends. To
think that I actually come off as an idealistic optimist--who would have
thunk? :-) Peter, are you out there and observing this?
> Sure, there is straight slime, there are straight leather people, all of
> that. But they have the luxury of not having their misbehavior reflect on
> their entire community. This is a sociological reality, and batting your
> doubtless lovely eyes innocently will not make it go away. If a white man
> rapes a woman it's an article in the newspaper; if a black man rapes a
> white woman in Omaha, black men are shot at from cars in Atlanta. Same
> with Us and Them. Nobody read about Ted Bundy and considered him to be
> representative of heterosexual men; nobody sees one of those truck drivers
> with the silver silhouette of a naked teen girl on the mud flaps and thinks
> of him as a typical straight man.
Bad straight behavior isn't representive of the straight community by
virtue of the fact that the population density of straight people is
significantly higher than that of the gay community. I'll
take your advice to get real and say *that* is a reality. And I can't
believe that I'm the one having to come to the defense of
leather-loving-people (me, of all people, Mr. Preppy Extraordinaire). I
come to their defense because it seems unfair to me that others should
target them because of their sexual turn-ons. I'm not talking about
pedophilic members of NAMBLA here...nor am I talking about rapists,
two-timing freaks, or even people with really bad hair (lame joke...cue
laughter for audience)...I'm talking about people. Genuine people--at
least as far as I or you know. I'm not ready to lump them into the "bad
apple" barrel until such evidence is presented that portrays them as
significantly (alpha level of .05) worse than the rest of us.
> In our case, one bad apple does spoil the barrel. People who have not made
> up their minds about gays see one of our local Bondage Buddies on Broadway
> and make up their minds on the spot: gay people are sick. This isn't fair,
> it isn';t right, I don't endorse it, but we ignore this sociological
> reality at our peril. It is ESPECIALLY incumbent on us to present positive
> images to the rest of the world, not to see how badly we can frighten them.
>
You're goddamned right it isn't fair. Society is well known for its
unfairness. But instead of attacking people's sexual turn-ons, why aren't
we attacking that very hypocrisy that exists in society? Why must we also
adopt their mentality? Do you not realize that the people you're trying
to get to accept you are the very same people that are targeting you just
as you are targeting certain portions of the gay community?
Why spend time trying to change ignorant people's minds? While it may be
optimistic...hell--unrealistic--of me, I still say that for those members
of society who are disingenuous enough to base their opinions not on a few
images at the pride parade, to hell with them.
I am reminded of my history lessons back in high school, when blacks were
just beginning to assert their rights. There were some who demanded their
rights, some who wanted society to change and respect their dignity as
equal humans. There were others who thought that if they worked really
hard for the white man, that if they were the "model minority," then
everything would be okay...
Just a story I thought I'd share...
-khoa
"Every man is as Heaven made him, and sometimes a great deal worse."
-Cervantes
Khoa Nguyen
<email>
http://www.seattleu.edu/~kwa
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