I am...

• A user who needs account help!
• A participant with a general K5-related question, comment, or bug report...
• A journalist, seeking the wisdom of the K5 admin squirrels...
• A person who'd like to advertise on K5.
• Someone with a suggestion for a (non-K5 specific) Scoop feature
• Someone with a press release I'd like to send to Kuro5hin
• Someone who would like to exchange links with Kuro5hin
• Confused.
• Too sexy for Columbus, OH.

Have you made absolutely sure you are allowing cookies from "www.kuro5hin.org"? Good. If it still doesn't work, email help@kuro5hin.org and we'll fix you right up.

I have something to tell you!

As above, do go ahead and email help@kuro5hin.org. This goes for things like "I screwed up the formatting in my story...", "I noticed a duplicate comment...", "You misspelled "the" in teh Contact page..." y'know, things like that.

I am a journalist/mediaperson who'd like to investigate/interview/profile/take to lunch/sling mud at someone on the K5 crew.

I hate to sound like a broken record here, but you too, should probably email help@kuro5hin.org first. We're very friendly and forthcoming, and tend to like doing interviews, online chats, celebrity appearances at car shows, and whatnot.

I want to advertise on K5.

Well we'd be tickled. We rely on you to keep K5 running. Start here, it's easy.

No, I don't want to do that, I'd like to offer you a very special advertising opportunity...

Text ads are the only form of advertising we offer. We do not run cost-per-click ads, pay-per-lead ads, or any other form or variety of advertising. I'm sorry, but we are simply not interested, so it would be better if you didn't waste your time.

I have a question/comment/idea for Scoop.

Then you'll feel right at home on scoop.kuro5hin.org, the home of all things Scoopish. Poke around, see if your idea is already in the queue, or post an article about it. For Scoop-related bug reports, or smaller comments, you might try the scoop-help mailing list at Sourceforge as well.

I want to send you my company/organization's press release.

Don't. Seriously. Inoshiro gets very unhappy when we get spammed, and mailing us press releases is definitely spam. If you're really determined, feel free to submit a story, but if you want to see it posted, you better take some time to understand what kind of stories people here like, and put some effort into it.

To reiterate, spamming the admins with email press releases will get results you don't want. Don't do it.

I want to do a link exchange!

K5 does have a links page, for sites that the admins personally like, but I doubt anyone looks at it much. If one of us already personally like your site, maybe we'll put it there. If we don't, we never ever will. If you're even considering emailing us to ask for a link exchange, it's a dead certainty we don't read it and never will. Emailing us to suggest a link exchange is not worth your time. We don't even look at the sites that do this.

I'm confused.

Take a deep breath. It's going to be ok. Now sit down for a minute, have a glass of water. See, I bet you're feeling better already.

I'm too sexy for Columbus, Ohio.