AIDS
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
AIDS (Moar like gayds,amirite?) stands for Anally-Injected Death Sentence, and "S.I.D.A." in French, meaning "Sauvagement Introduit Dans l'Anus" (Savagely introduced into the anus). AIDS is the politically correct term for Gay Cancer and The Ebonic Plague and is proof that God hates fags and niggers because all niggers have aids. As the name of the disease implies, AIDS is transmitted predominantly via buttsecks between two men. Aside from buttsecks, gay people can transmit AIDS by touch or injecting their tainted blood into harmless str8 people on the street. Afrikan people are responsible because they ate/eat monkeys.
It is probably the single most hilarious thing to ever happen to the world, apart from the holocaust.
Do not confuse AIDS with Australian Outback AIDS, which is Alcohol Induced Dizzy Spells. Outback AIDS is curable and is made of win.
AIDS is also a weapon used by gays against the breeders.
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Origin and Transmission
AIDS is caused by two variant strains of HIV which, in turn, are variants of a virus known as SIV that is found in primates. It is widely believed that HIV (and consequently AIDS) spread to humans when some filthy dark-skinned sub-human raped a monkey. Other less likely theories include the ideas that HIV was originally transmitted by laboratory animals, that some slutty flight attendant bought it over from its original, isolated location, and that AIDS was developed by the United States under the conservative Reagan administration and intentionally introduced into the general population to destabilize the deviant base of the opposition party. This latter theory is particularly intriguing because Ronald Reagan embraced the cause of homosexuals with AIDS, and used to disease politically as a demonstration of his social awareness and compassion.
AIDS is also a common ingredient of theft-deterrent dye packs or sensors. When a criminal removes the sensor from a stolen article the AIDS-containing ink is released on his skin, infecting them. They then spread the disease to every pool within travel-able distance. If a nigra uses your pool you should close it due to AIDS.
AIDS a Closer Look
If one looks at AIDS under a microscope you will find that AIDS is very small compared to other cells. You will also see AIDS trying to take over everything around it. What do small things trying to take over everything around it remind you of? That's right, Jews. Jews actually developed AIDS while cannibalizing abras, they were planning on using it to take revenge and rule the world. Fortunately for them, they remembered that they are jewish and therefor anything they create are also jewish. He also remembered that the Jews never really win. AIDS is simply a concentration of Jewgolds in the bloodstream forcing it to surrender to all incoming disease.
AIDS and Culture
AIDS is a popular theme in television and pop culture. This is because there is nothing funnier than the pain and suffering of another human being.
"Bad AIDS" vs "Good AIDS"
British news program Brass Eye brought us the definition of "Good AIDS" as getting it from a blood transfusion as opposed to "Bad AIDS" obtained by your boyfriend. "Good AIDS" is just another way of saying "Hey, I have AIDS, but the way I caught it is fucking BORING."
Perhaps the most overused and misused form of AIDS is the "Good AIDS", common amongst stupid people that either want attention, got butt-hurt and turned emo, or just didn't clean off the needle that their lover mercilessly shoved into their shithole during a awkward and confusing ass tattoo. All in all, "Good AIDS" is a dreary and shitty way to get pwned and die, and give a reason for others to tell you to "die from AIDS".
AIDS and Weight Loss
AIDS is an effective weight loss tool.
AIDS - Now in Chocolate flavor too!
Notable Incidents
- Habbo Hotel, based in Finland regularly has its pools closed due to AIDS. On 6/12/06, AID-Infested nigras entered the hotel to protest the racism of the hotel staff, and ultimately caused the entire hotel to shut down due to AIDS.
- Encyclopedia Dramatica is sometimes closed due to AIDS
- AIDS has pwned Africa, closing its pool indefinitely.
AIDS Denial
AIDS dissidents believe that HIV doesn't cause teh AIDS. When confronted with evidence to the contrary, they pout and scream that such evidence is a lie, produced by the greedy pharmaceutical companies that produce AIDS treatments.
On a lulzy note, AIDS-denialists claim they are real skeptics. Though, actual skeptics say otherwise.
On an even lulzier note, several HIV-infested Britfags (in the most literal sense of the term) started up an AIDS-denial newsletter called "Continuum" that was forced to fold last Thursday BECAUSE ALL THE EDITORS HAD DIED. Habeeb it!
AIDStube
Remember, if life gives you AIDS, make LemonAIDS!! Here are a few tips to help you cheer up your AIDS-infested friends:
- Go up to a person with AIDS and say "I've got a hilarious joke for you! What is the cure for AIDS?". They will most likely respond with "THERE'S A CURE FOR AIDS?!?!". You say
"Of course not! It's a joke!"They fucking cured it! What has science done?
- Suggest they try Dr Garlic's Yummy AIDS Salad as an alternative to expensive retroviral medication, Ingredients include lemon, garlic, olive oil, potato and beets, and that spells delicious with a capital AIDS.
- Suggest they fucking shower every now and again.
Facts
- It is impossible for straight white people to get AIDS.
- If you have AIDS, it is mandatory that you have sex with as many people as you can. The more the merrier!
- If you have sex with a virgin, the AIDS completely vanish from your system.
- The score is currently AIDS: 23 million, Homos: 0.
- You can get AIDS from sitting on a toilet seat.
- Having AIDS is a bannable offense on TOW.
- Homosexuals hate AIDS because it symbolizes the filth of their "lifestyle."
- Ethiopians hate AIDS because Bob Geldolf won't leave them the fuck alone.
- AIDS is the primary cause of pool closures world wide.
- HIV is synonymous with AIDS.
- Everyone who has AIDS dies a slow and miserable death.
- One can buy AIDS for 5 bucks on any street corner.
- In Soviet Russia, AIDS has you!
- If you are old, be sure that you buy hearing AIDS.
- AIDS can be defeated by quilting and red ribbons.
- Jews cause AIDS.
- Dani Faulk has AIDS IRL.
- Eazy E got AIDS from Freddy Mercury.
- Applemilk1988 has JapAIDS.
- According to actress and Scientologist Jenna Elfman, "AIDS is a state of mind, not a disease.."
- I gave AIDS to your sister, dude. Yeah, you should probably tell her about that.
- Ted Haggard has AIDS and gave it to his wife.
- According to blogger Andrew Sullivan, AIDS improves your sex life by eliminating the need to use a condom.
- You have AIDS.
- Your mom has AIDS.
- Giving aids gives you win!
- Getting it makes you an hero
- AIDS is hard to research because it's so difficult to get the lab rats to buttfuck.
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See also
External links
- Habbo Hotel Take a guess what's in the pool.
- The good citizens of Alabama prevent more AIDS-pool incidents IRL.
- GAMBIAN COOKS CURE AIDS FOR AFRICA! FUCK
- If someone near you has AIDS, for fuck sake, DON'T LET THEM CLEAN YOUR SHOES.
- A new way of enjoying your AIDS has surfaced. Why take diet pills when you can enjoy AIDS?
- An educational animation about healthy nutrition for infested subjects
- Documentary on AIDS
AIDS is part of a series on Homosexual Deviants | |
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AIDS is part of a series on Diseases and Disorders. |
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Categories: People | Sex