Profit
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| USE IT AT YOUR OWN RISK. |
This "meme" along with its partner ????, comes from South Park's episode preachy lesson about how 1337 capitalism is Gnomes. Thieving trolls are sneaking into South Park homes in the middle of the night to steal the boys' drawers. After getting busted by the gang, the gnomes use a highly advanced mathematical formula to explain how they turn stolen underwear into Jew gold. The formula was as follows:
The ultimate goal in life is to gain as much profit as is possible. Jews learn this at an early age. Profit can come in a wide variety of forms and the achievement of any type of profit makes you a winnar. Gaining of profit is the only way to make your miserable excuse for a life worthwhile. By its very nature, all profit is delicious.
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Types of profit
Please note, profit is hierarchical, many lesser profits can be exchanged for a greater profit. Hence the need for work.
Lulz
Lulz are the ultimate goal. Nevar forget, do it for the lulz. No matter where, no matter when, the achievement of lulz is paramount. This is what we are here for.
Delicious Loli
Delicious loli is a truly delicious kind of profit, outranking all profits save lulz. The raep of a Loli is one of the ultimate goals of any Anon as it is a vital step towards winning the internets, and life itself. Remember, the more lolis that you raep before getting V& the more of a success your life has been. Also, nevar forget, stick it in the pooper.
Delicious Drugs
Delicious drugs take away the pain of your miserable life and may give you a +5 to all stats. Drugs can be combined with lolis to facilitate moar raep. There are many, many kinds of drugs, all of which should be used repeatedly, preferably combined together...with alcohol.
Delicious Jew golds
Contrary to expectations, Jew gold is almost the least valuable of profits. However, it is noteworthy because enough Jew golds can buy drugs or lolis, allowing you to strike at the weak-point for massive damage, but Jew gold will never buy you LULZ. Note, as the name would suggest, this level of profit is jealously guarded by our Jew overlords.
Accumulation of Jew golds is the best way to strike back at Zog.
Delicious Cake
Delicious Cake is always a perfectly acceptable profit for any struggle. Delicious Cake can be traded in for small amounts of Jew golds or can be used as bait for Lolis.
Internet Speakz
The following is the prescribed way to instruct someone on how to gain profit, normally sarcastically.
- Step one
- Step two
- ????
- Profit!!!
This construction is often used and 4 steps is usually the format. Longer may only be used in the event of truly epic lulz potential. An example for idiots follows.
or
- Accuse Saddam of having weapons of mass destruction
- Invade Iraq
- Walk around for a while, kill some babies
- ????
- Profit!!!
or
- Film Loose Change after smoking weed
- Protest in everywhere and yell at Bush (like he gives a shit)
- Don mask and become Epic fail guy
- ????
- PROFIT!!!
See Also
