By 'coming out of our closets', we may not realise that we are
entering financial situations unlike the ones we see modelled by our straight counterparts. We are neither worse off or better off financially - we're simply different.
The story begins in our teens when straight kids experiment with life and discover who they are. But gay teens are often confused. Their explorations and
self-discoveries are often delayed until their 20s when they choose to deal with life in one of three
main ways:
Some of us physically segregate ourselves by moving into specifically gay and lesbian
neighbourhoods. Others assimilate - that is to say, hide behind a 'straight' facade.
And others manage to carefully negotiate acceptance of their orientation in the straight world.
However we choose to live our lives though, we still need financial
support and planning.
Many gay people come out and begin spending extravagantly in their
20's, but this is a crucial opportunity to start saving. It's more important for lesbians and gays to begin saving early because discrimination may cut short our climb up the career ladder.
After saving money during our 20's, laying a financial groundwork of investments in our
30's should come next. One reason the 30's are so good for investment is that they're one of the two 'smooth' epochs of our lives when we can get a lot of financial groundwork done - the other being
our 50's.
 Todd Rainey, author of
"Money Talk, A Gay & Lesbian’s Guide to Financial
Success," says his research shows the stereotype is true.
Rainey is a charted financial consultant and travels the US lecturing on how to invest. He’s found that most gays and lesbians aren’t interested in financial planning.
"A great deal of the stereotype is true," said Rainey. "In my practice, an overwhelming amount of straights save and invest early on in their working careers, but gays and lesbians just don’t want to plan."
"If I have a financial seminar targeted towards gays and lesbians, I’m lucky if ten people show up," added Rainey. "But if I have a general seminar, I usually get more than 100 people."
Rainey believes the fact most gays and lesbians don’t have children and thus future college tuition payments, is a significant reason why they don’t plan for the future. (see
"Financial Planning: A Process for Gays and
Lesbians")
"I think because of discrimination, gays and lesbians tend to be more self sufficient and self centered, than their straight counterparts when it comes to finances,"
says Faust |
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Many don't start investing early because when we reach our
30's we 'have a hangover from our 20's.' In our 30's, we try to hold onto the extravagance
the previous decade helped us discover. On top of this, adult-youths are virtually all we see in gay publications and gay culture.
This social pressure makes leaving the 20's very tough. Then, when we find ourselves in our 40's, our straight counterparts may be reaching the heights of their careers, but they are also getting suspicious of why
we aren't married. As we remain unmarried through our 40's, we drift out whether we want to or not.
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Discrimination can mean that we reach a point in our careers where we are economically penalized for being gay, whether we are harassed, passed over, sidelined or downsized. As we reach that 'lavender ceiling' we may want to start a business of our own. That's something we can do if we've been saving and investing.
Whatever happens in our 40's, we harvest the bounty of that hard work in our 50's. In our 60's, if we planned effectively, our investments earn our money for us. As we enter our 70's, we turn toward a less self-centered attitude and find what we have to give back to life.
It's important to point out that everyone's life experience is
different and we cannot always categorise ourselves in our attitudes
by what is 'expected' of us in a decade-by-decade approach. What's
true for one individual might not necessarily be true for someone
else. However, the above statements are true for a great number of
people; the moral of the story - whether gay or straight - is to kick the frivolous spending habit and begin saving
and planning for our old-age, early! Whether or not we encounter career discrimination or other pitfalls of being gay, we don't want to be caught off guard by a desperate financial situation at the end of life.
Being financially secure could make our lives happier. Of course, that assumes you base your happiness on how much money you have. You
yourself can
only decide yourself whether that assumption is valid.
GayCruz Money Advice
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GayCruz
- Essential Money Management
