Goatse

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Image:Hello.jpg

If you were offended by this picture, maybe you shouldn't have looked at it. Sorry, Man.


It still isn't as bad as this. Click.


It *STILL(!!!)* isn't as bad as this. Click.

 
 
And then Jesus showed me the light!
 

 

Fred Phelps, pastor


Fun facts about Goatse

The immediate effects of goatse.
The immediate effects of goatse.
Goaste in training.
Goaste in training.
Even furries love goatse.
Even furries love goatse.
A CHALLENGER APPEARS.
A CHALLENGER APPEARS.
girls like goatse too.
girls like goatse too.
Goatse.cks: Resurrection. Praise the Lord!
Goatse.cks: Resurrection. Praise the Lord!

These facts are all true:

  • Anyone who Goatse's you obviously got Goatse'd themself, or they wouldn't have known of the site.
  • Hard at work
  • Goatse can take bed posts up the ass
  • Goatse seems to be married because he has a ring on his hand... FUCKING LOOK!!!
  • Goatse has a rather large pilonidal cyst or a second, virgin asshole.
  • Goatse has his own online encyclopedia called www.goatsepedia.com
  • Goatse is the most popular member of The Power 5.
  • Goatse’s best friend is The Giver.
  • Goatse is butthurt!!!!
  • Showing Goatse to little kids in school can result in Major fucking lulz
  • Goatse can refer to the man in the picture, the picture itself, the sex move, or the website that started it all.
  • Goatse has evolved into Goatse marathon
  • He is also known as Bottle Guy. You can also understand this fact with the aid of this video.
  • At least 100 people see Goatse for the first time every day
  • Goatse enjoys long walks on the beach and FUCKING HUGE DILDOS
  • Despite what you see in the picture (study it for a moment) the human intestine is not a big truck you can dump something into, but a series of tubes.
  • http://goatse.cz hosts an exact mirror of the main pages of the goatse.cx site, and manages to preserve most of the original phonetic touch and feel
  • A survey found goatse gives 90% of people who view it nightmares for months.
  • It is now illegal [1]
  • There are over 9000 links to goatse on ED.
  • omg! snape kills dumbledore!!!!!!!!112@@!
  • Goatse has NOTHING to do with Goats or the letter F.
  • Goatse is what turns you on at night.
  • Goatse is a pretty cool guy eh takes it in the ass and doesn't afraid of anything.

Legislation Inspired by Goatse

§ 2252C. Misleading words or digital images on the Internet
(a) IN GENERAL.—Whoever knowingly embeds words or digital
images into the source code of a website with the intent to deceive a person
into viewing material constituting obscenity shall be fined under this title 
and imprisoned for not moar than 10 years.

(b) MINORS.—Whoever knowingly embeds words or digital images
into the source code of a website with the intent to deceive
a minor into viewing material harmful to minors on the Internet
shall be fined under this title and imprisoned for not moar than 20 years.

(c) CONSTRUCTION.—For the purposes of this section, a word or
digital image that clearly indicates the sexual content of the
site, such as ‘sex’ or ‘porn’, is not misleading.

(d) DEFINITIONS.—As used in this section—HR 4472 EAS.

(1) the terms ‘material that is harmful to minors’ and ‘sex’
have the meaning given such terms in section 2252B; and
‘‘(2)the term 'source code’ means the combination of text and
other characters comprising the content, both viewable
and nonviewable, of a web page, including any website publishing
language, programming language, protocol or functional content, as
well as any successor languages or protocols.’’.

(b) TABLE OF SECTIONS.—The table of sections for chapter 110
of title 18, United States Code, is amended by inserting after
the item relating to section 2252B the following:
2252C. Misleading words or digital images on the Internet.’’.

That means that you cannot misleadingly link it because you could trick people into viewing obscenity. However feel free to link it via Aim or your favorite IM client because the fact that they are told what every URL actually is means they are not being tricked. This also means that somewhere some fuckwit politician got goatse'd

The Man Behind The Anus

After a hard day's stretching, Kirk Johnson takes time to relax (his ass) at home, and enjoy the beauty of nature.
After a hard day's stretching, Kirk Johnson takes time to relax (his ass) at home, and enjoy the beauty of nature.

One very persistent internets user spent months and months trawling all the gay erotica and anal stretching newsgroups, and eventually located the star of this picture, by matching the pattern of moles on his ass. It is with many lulz that ED advises the world that the Goatse's real name is Kirk Johnson, and he posts pictures and videos of himself regularly on the newsgroup alt.binaries.erotica.male.anal He also posts regularly on imagefap, and has thousands (I'm not shitting you) of pictures of his flexible poopchute. Here's some goatse videos. . .Not for the faint of heart You can even hear Kirk Johnson's voice and here's his profile page! :D Be sure to post comments and tell him how great he is.

Uses of Goatse

The complete set

lol
lol
Moar
Moar

If you're too lazy to click on every picture, there's a slideshow of this exact picture set HERE. However, this site is owned and operated by the same person as Meatspin, and we all know what a ghey fgt he is.


Gallery of Goatse

See also

Goatse Trolling

  • Eric [8:47 PM]: dude i have this site i post all my pics on for the class
  • Eric [8:47 PM]: want to see them
  • Eric [8:47 PM]:  ?
  • Mike [8:47 PM]: Sure
  • Eric [8:47 PM]: they're kind of controversial
  • Eric [8:47 PM]: http://tinyurl.com/2z6knv http://tinyurl.com/3jw7qM387M
  • Mike [8:48 PM]: holy shit dude
  • Eric [8:48 PM]: lol
  • Mike [8:53 PM]: They were for Gavenus' class???
  • Eric [8:54 PM]: LOL yea, he said they were "artistic"
  • Eric [8:55 PM]: He said the first was ok, but the second was too over the top
  • Mike [8:55 PM]: Yeah I'll say
  • Mike [8:57 PM]: OK dude, I just looked at your pic...I still don't know you...you sure your talking to the right s/n?

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